SCANDALS IMPACT RANKINGS
Buckeyes, Gators Title Game Hopes in Deep Kimchee
GAINESVILLE, Florida (UPI)...Recently-revealed political indiscretions seem to have bled over into the world of college football. A poll conducted this week by AP-Ipsos indicates BCS voters are allowing party issues to affect their ballots for the NCAA Top 25. Specifically, teams in states currently held by Republicans are feeling the backlash of such events as explicit e-mails by Republican representative Mark Foley and a coin-collection stealing snafu by a GOP fund-raiser in Ohio. Bowl Championship Series poll voters are deciding teams in the blue states are simply the lesser of two evils and supporting teams such as Rutgers at the expense of clubs from red states, such as Florida and Ohio State. When it’s all said and done, the BCS bowl match-ups could ultimately reflect political lines rather than win-loss records and power ratings! Coaches of red-state teams with clout and alumni support are asking for help digging up those dirty little Democrat secrets!
Following an 8-10 Week Six (48-58-3, .453 season), our putrid prophet belts down one of those "protein shakes" that reportedly helped 76-year-old televangelist Pat Robertson leg-press 2000 pounds and displays....
THE WEBER KID’S 2006 WEEK 7 FORECAST
("Submitted for your approval...Just a first down away from... the Twilight Zone")
THURS. OCT. 12
#12 CLEMSON over Temple giving 44: Vindicator initially thought the Las Vegas Review Journal had printed the over/under without a spread when he saw the original 46-point line. The North Koreans claim to have tested a bomb equal to nearly 550 tons of dynamite...or approximately the amount of force the Tigers will rain down upon the Owls this week...Tigers 51 Owls 3
BOSTON COLLEGE over #22 Virginia Tech taking 2 1/2: Eagles lost a spot in the rankings and didn’t even play last week! They can’t be happy about that (but then, mere 22-0 win over Maine doesn’t inspire voters to say "Wow! We gotta’ rank these guys!"). Hokies have no quality wins. Eagles, who could easily be 2-3, found a way to topple Clemson and BYU in extra innings...BC 27 VT 24
SAT. OCT. 14
#1 Ohio State over MICHIGAN STATE giving 15: Vindy thanks Jim Tressel for calling off the dogs with over 12 minutes to play last week against Bowling Green, allowing the Falcons to cover. Are Spartans in traditional mid-season swoon? A couple of quick Buckeye scores and MSU will likely quit..Ohio State 38 MSU 16
#2 Florida over #11 AUBURN taking 2: As part of their "directed reading" independent study course, Tigers’ players must read and do a 10-page report on ..."Little T Learns to Share"...Gators 21 Auburn 17
Arizona State over #3 USC taking 19: Line seems to reflect margins of loss by the Devils rather than margins of win by Troy. SoCal has yet to cover the number in three conference tilts this season. Here’s hopin’ the off-week helps State regroup and runs Trojans’ ATS loss-streak to 4...USC 31 ASU 17
PENN STATE over #4 Michigan taking 7 : Anybody remember Coach Carr’s vehement complaining that put an extra 2 seconds on the clock in Ann Arbor that ultimately cost the Lions a perfect record last year?!!! The Lions sure as hell do! (So does this alum, who watched in horror with many of his fellow Nifty Lion alumni companions! ).... PSU 23 Michigan 21
#5 WEST VIRGINIA over Syracuse giving 25: Mounties are 3-1 against the line, but are also a 50-yard punt return for TD with just over a minute remaining at Mississippi State away from 2-2 ATS. However, Vindy notes WVU was sloppy, suffering 11 flags for 132 yards. Orange 5-1 ATS, but we’ll call it...’Eers 38 Orange 7
#6 TEXAS over Baylor giving 29: Investigation into the Mark Foley scandal has led to the public release of an e-mail from the former Florida representative to a teenage former page in Austin that states "Do I make you a little Longhorny, baby?!" Bears have been in most games to the end, covering 3 of 5...Texas 41 Bayluh 7
Cincinnati over #7 LOUISVILLE taking 26 ½: Cards still undefeated, but appear to have lost a little steam since losing the starting backfield in early September. Redbirds posted their first spread loss last week...Louisville 41 Cincinnati 22
#8 Tennessee: IDLE (next vs. Alabama)
#9 Notre Dame: IDLE (next vs. UCLA)
#10 California over WASHINGTON STATE giving 7 ½: No disrespect to improving Cougars, but 2 ½-point line move in favor of Wazzou looks like an overreaction to 6-point loss to USC. Vin reverts to statement from a couple weeks ago that Cal is still the second-best club in the PAC-10. With Auburn’s fall last Saturday, maybe nobody’s "safe", however...Bears 27 WSU 17
#14 LSU over Kentucky giving 26 ½: Vindicator changed his mind from his initial selection here (rarely a good sign). Upon further review, Bengals only yielding 10 points per game, including matches against Auburn and Florida. They should break into the 40's here against traditionally-porous Wildcats’ defense...Tigers 48 KY 16
#15 Iowa over INDIANA giving 17 1/2: Vindy hopes Hawkeyes carry over some of that fury they unleashed on the Boilermakers...Iowa 44 Indy 16.
Vanderbilt over #16 GEORGIA taking 13: This match features two of the Weber Kid’s biggest Week Six disappointments. ‘Dawgs were up 27-24 over the Vols going into the 4th quarter, when they gave up two turnovers and 27 points! Joja’ needs to get angry...Bill Clinton angry...but won’t! This forecaster pooh-poohed the ‘Dores early when they lost Cutler to the draft. They’re hanging tough though...UGA 24 Admirals 17
SE Missouri State @ #17 ARKANSAS: No line.
#18 OREGON over Ucla giving 11: Due to malfunctions of the home PC, Vindicator was unable to view all of the available angles on this play and simply let the original call in the sportsbook stand after two minutes... Drakes 34 Bruins 21
#19 Missouri over TEXAS A&M giving 2 1/2: LOCK OF DA’ WEEK. OK, Tigers have proven themselves worthy as contenders. Vindy ain’t impressed with Aggies four wins, that came over Citadel, UL-Laugh-At-Us, a horrible Weeziana Tech club and Army,,,Mizzou 34 A&M 17
#21 Nebraska over KANSAS STATE giving 10 ½: Nice job by the Purple Kitties to rebound from two-touchdown beating by Bayluh to overcome Oklahoma State. Big Red effectively kept Iowa State off the board after the first quarter, allowing only a meaningless score with :06 left in the game...Nebraska 31 K-State 14
Iowa State over #23 OKLAHOMA taking 19 ½: Other than vengeful mood leftover from sound thrashing by Texas, can’t believe Sooners will keep this many points between themselves and the Cyclones. (And because we said that, we like this as the best chance for "wish I had it back"!)...Okie-Doke 35 Dust Devils 19
NAVY over #24 Rutgers giving 1 1/2: Middies haven’t generally been spread-friendly on Homecoming. Tough pick though, with both sides playing well. This is probably the best rushing offense Knights have encountered this year...Navy 21 State Uni of NJ 17
#25 WISCONSIN over Minnesota giving 10: We’re putting a lot on the shoulders of the Badgers’ defense here to shut down Minny’s offense. Wisky is still sporting some of that emotion from Barry Alvarez’ retirement. Gophers went to OT before succumbing to Weber’s Lions... Cheese-heads 27 Gerbils 14
SUN. OCT. 15
NEW MEXICO STATE over #20 Boise State taking 25: Aggies have made for some entertaining football this year, scoring nearly 33 ppg and losing to both UTEP and New Mexico by only 6. Broncos posting 40 ppg. If NMSU can hold the Potato-Heads below half-a-century, they can cover...BSU 44 NMSU 27
BETWEEN THE HASHMARKS
Vin takes a bow for calling back-to-back upsets by NC State, the exact Nebraska 28-14 over ISU score and a near exacta on Ohio State-Bowling Green with a 34-7 prediction (35-7 actual).
As previously noted, Terrell Owens has authored the children’s book, "Little T Learns to Share". Watch for these future classic publications from our wacky wideout: "Little T.O.D." (Thanks to college buddy and longtime friend, Andy Marchetto for that one.), Dr. Seuss-like "I Am Sham,; Sham, I Am". "Little T Takes the Training Wheels Off His Stationery Bike", "Little T. Gets a Big Owwie",and "Little T. and the Magic Bottle of Supplements". In related news, Owens pitched yet another fit that he ain’t the Cowboys go-to guy on "downer and distance"!
Last Spring, UNLV coach Mike Sanford took the names off the backs of his team’s jerseys. Given this season’s performance, he may consider removing the school name off the front of da’ jerseys too!
Celeb-reality star Flava’ Flav often wears a helmet with horns. Maybe he wants to be the Vikes’ mascot???!! He also sports an over-sized tick-tock around his neck. Inquiring minds wanna’ know...does his clock start on the kick, on the ready to flay from the referee or when the women vying for his affections actually touch his balls!
A pair of North Korean soldiers wandered last Saturday into the South Korean side of the Demilitarized Zone, touching off an international incident. However, through an interpreter, the soldiers said they were "just a couple of sports fans" and were reacting to rumors that border guards on the south side were "watching the Georgia-Tennessee game on CBS." The pair were later disappointed to learn "CBS" didn’t stand for the "Communist Broadcasting System".
"Locked in a Box?": The lock record jumps up to 4-2 behind Mizzou’s very nice road win as a doggie over Texas Tech! Weber will cheer the Tigers again this week in the "lock" role!
Shoppe Talk: Those Frightenin’ Irish (1-5) and Texas Wrong Horns (0-5) re-inhabit the Shoppe after showing up on the wrong side of the spread again!
Vindy’s Week 7 Best Bets: Last Week: 2-3 Season: 14-13 (.519)
Maryland -2 over VIRGINIA, WYOMING +4 ½ over Utah, SAN JOSE STATE -14 over Utah State, EAST CAROLINA +2 ½ over Tulsa, Army +5 ½ over UCONN