TEAM TIMEPIECE TOPS FIRST LADY’S WISH LIST
LITTLE ROCK, Arkansas (UPI)... Friends close to Janet Huckabee, wife of the outbound Republican state governor, revealed to reporters that she wants the highly-coveted Razorbacks wall-clock that sounds the soooooeeeey-pig call on the hour as part of a "housewarming" gift upon moving into her new residence! The first lady has come under fire of late for the gift registry at Target and Dillard’s. No stranger to controversy as Governor Huckabee himself has been called to the carpet for previous ethics issues, an irritated First Lady shot back, saying "Question my morals, but don’t question my support for our team!" A spokesperson for the Governor’s office said, "Mrs. Huckabee has the right to know the time in any manner she chooses." An anonymous Target employee leaked information suggesting the registry also includes a monogrammed trough bearing the school logo!
Boy! Was that Vonage comparison last week timely or what????!!!! Our stupefied seer staggered to 6-11 (107-113-6, .486 season), taking four bad beats...two by a half-point, two by a single point each! Vindicator blames the faux pas on lack of concentration due to his invitation to the Tom Cruise-Katie Holmes wedding! (By the way, Suri Cruise had the Hokies layin’ the points over Wake! Oh wait...that was Britney Spears’ baby!). Jacksonville Jaguars coach Jack Del Rio is 2-0 since sporting a suit on the sidelines. Hoping for similar results, the Weber Kid dusts off an old three-piece and publishes...
THE WEBER KID’S 2006 WEEK 13 FORECAST
THURS. NOV. 23
MIAMI over #18 Boston College taking 4: Everything Thanksgiving, a big turkey receives a presidential pardon. Maybe Team Coral Gables should make a quick stop at the White House before hosting the Eagles...’Canes 18 BC 17
FRI. NOV. 24
#5 ARKANSAS over #9 Louisiana State (PK): Two of the country’s best stop-squads face-off. Can’t see Houston Nutt letting the Razorbacks slack-off now they’re locked into the conference championship game. Bengals were Vindy’s preseason pick to take the SEC. Only two conference teams are allowed in the BCS bowls. A Tiger win would help, but they’ll need two losses from Florida or an Arkansas loss in the SEC title game. Looks like a punt-fest a la LSU-Auburn earlier this season....Pigs 10 LSU 6
Texas A&M over #11 TEXAS taking 13: Steers get their starting freshman-phenom trigger-man back, but it’s tough to argue with Aggies’ 6-0 spread-win run...Longhorns 27 A&M 21
#23 NEBRASKA over Colorado giving 15: Remember when both teams would be highly-ranked for this one and it meant something?! Maybe the Buffs need another controversy or scandal or something to instigate better play. "Paging Ms. Hnida...Ms. Katie Hnida to the white courtesy phone, please."...Big Red 31Bison 10
SAT. NOV. 25
#1 Ohio State: IDLE (next Da’ National Championship Game!)
#2 Michigan: IDLE (next Da’ Bowls!)
#3 USC over #6 Notre Dame giving 7 1/2: Collective win-loss record of Trojans’ victims to-date: 57-44 (.564). Ditto for Irish victims: 53-59 (.473). Leprechauns’ one loss came at home to current-#2 Michigan. Troy’s only loss came by two at unranked Oregon State. USC ends the Buckeyes-Wolverines BCS rematch talk... USC 27 Irish 17
FLORIDA STATE over #4 Florida taking 9 1/2: Injuns have suffered very disappointing year that has cost OC Jeff Bowden his job and no doubt led to calls for his daddy’s resignation as head coach. Money’s coming in on the Gators, but we like the ‘Noles to give this game anything they have left...including a season’s worth of frustration .... because unlike previous tilts this season (after Miami opener), this match means something to State...Gators 16 Squaws 13
South Florida over #7 WEST VIRGINIA taking 20 ½: Bulls loss to Louisville gives Vin reason to pause on this pick..and it might well be a "wish I had it back" for that reason, but we like the Mounties to play conservatively with no chance at the BCS Championship and simply win out to get the Big Least crown and its accompanying BCS bowl ...’Eers 38 USF 17
#8 Louisville over PITT giving 12: Number’s somewhat lower than expected by this prophet. Mounties averaged nearly 10 yards per carry at Pitt. Things are all knotted up atop the Big East and Cards can take care of business by simply winning here, having already beaten West Virginia then hoping the Mounties can beat Rutgers next week... Red Birds 35 Panthers 13
#10 Wisconsin: IDLE (next: da’ Capital One Bowl)
NEVADA-RENO over #12 Boise State taking 2 1/2: Wolfpack can end Broncos undefeated season. BCS officials hope they will. Boise’s do-everything RB Ian Johnson will play while wearing a flak jacket over his ribs. A Fiesta bid is hanging in the balance for a non-Big Six conference team. Maybe next year...Reno 38 Boise 35
#13 Oklahoma over OKLAHOMA STATE giving 6: Adrian Peterson will not play. Taking a few liberties with a quote from "Flash Gordon"..." Professor Weber says the absence of the Sooners starting backfield ‘is no cause..for alarm’." Watch out for improving Cowpokes next season...OK 24 Cowboys 12
#14 Auburn: IDLE (next vs. Florida, SEC Championship)
Syracuse @ #15 RUTGERS: OFF
#16 Georgia Tech over GEORGIA taking 1 ½: At least the Bees know which quarterback will start (though they still don’t know what they’ll get from him!). Dawgs came out of the ashes to smash Auburn last week, but nothing else among their results on the season screams "Go with Joja’!"...Wreck 13 UGA 10
#17 VIRGINIA TECH over Virginia giving 17: Both teams have covered four of their last five coming in. Edge to the home team off the huge road victory at Wake Forest and having the much-better D...Tech 24 Cavs 3
#19 TENNESSEE over Kentucky giving 18 ½: Vindy has been off the Vols most of the season , but we think they can pound porous Wildcats’ defense that gave up 40 in near-loss to Weeziana-Monroe...Tennessee 41 Mildcats 17
#20 Wake Forest over MARYLAND taking 1: Terps have won 5 of last 6 games decided by less than a touchdown. Call Vindicator crazy, but we still prefer Wake’s rushing game and stout defense and we’re staying on the Demon Deacons despite meltdown at home against the Hokies...Deacons 17 Box Turtles 13
#21 Brigham Young over UTAH giving 11: LOCK OF DA’ WEEK. Coogs have 11 turnovers in 11 games. For the past few seasons, the Utes have been in the BCS chase, while the Mormons have been home in the post-season. This season, Utah’s still bowling, but revenge is sweet for...Cougars 35 Utes 16
#22 California: IDLE (next vs. Stanford 12/2)
South Carolina over #24 CLEMSON taking 5 1/2: UPSET SPECIAL OF DA’ WEEK. Brawl (won by Clemson 13-9) kept both sides from the post-season last year. Vindicator was wrong when he wrote off Gamecocks’ chances of an upset a few weeks ago. Promising season for the Tigers fizzled with back-to-losses earlier and the return to the rankings will be short-lived...SC 23 Clemson 20
Purdue over #25 HAWAII taking 17: The Islanders have trounced opponents by an average of 36 ppg, but Boilers have sufficient offensive weapons to make a track-meet outta’ this ...’Bows 48 Purdue 41
BETWEEN THE HASHMARKS
As the final scores rolled in during Week 12's bust, Vin did his best Charlie Brown impersonation, quipping, "Aaaaaagghhh! Every pick I touch gets ruined!"
In May, the maternal parents of the NBA’s LeBron James and Amare Stoudemire were sentenced the same day for previous DUI arrests. Apparently, they’re looking to start a new chapter of MADD...Mothers Advocating Drunk Driving (Alright, alright! Save the hate-mail for somebody who cares!)
The Buckeyes were called for a rare "roughing the center" on an early Michigan 4th-and-13 last week. Vindy hates those big, gaudy flower arrangements in the middle of the table and plans to get flagged for "roughing the centerpiece" during his Thanksgiving Day dinner!
Some donor nicknamed "Mattress Mack" is forcing University of North Texas to rename its stadium after recently-deposed HC Darrell Dickey to maintain the rather-sizable monetary gift he’s given the school. Can ya hear the broadcasters saying "Welcome to a perfect Fall afternoon as the Mean Green hosts Louisiana-Lafayette at the Dick"???!!!
"Locked in a Box?": Vindy posts his 3rd straight lock win on the strength of Broncos’ cover over Utah State to go to 8-4 (.667) on the year!
Shoppe Talk: Those !@&^$@!!* Leprechauns let Vindy down again, missing by a half-point over Army to go 2-9 for the forecast!
Vindy’s Week 13 Best Bets: Last Week: 2-1-1 Season: 30-25-2 (.545)
Air Force -10 1/2 over UNLV, New Mexico State -6 1/2 over UTAH STATE, Mississippi State +3 over OL’ MISS, BUFFALO +16 over Central Michigan, Cincinnati -3 ½ over UCONN
(If you’re keeping score at home, over the last three weeks, Vindicator’s "lock" picks and "best bets" have gone a combined 12-4-1 for a blazing 75% win rate!)