Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Vindy's Picks Week 5-2009


BRIGANTINE INLET, New Jersey (Reuters)....Russian subs were recently spotted again off the East coast, as they were this past August, and were escorted to the Jersey shore by U.S. Coast Guard vessels. The Soviet sailors initially told officials they were simply filming a re-make of “20,000 Leagues under the Sea”, then later admitted they had heard T.O. was traded to Buffalo and entered U.S. waters seeking some autographs. In addition, the Kremlin issued a formal statement indicating the seamen were planning to take in a few Major League playoff games to determine if a Russian-born player could lead his team to the World Series....or what the media would dub “The Hunt for Mr. Red October”! The Communist sailors later defected, turning themselves over to bookies from the Atlantic City “consulate”, who offered them <>. The newly-freed submariners saluted their newfound freedom, shouting <<“Better ‘spread’ than ‘red’”>>, then broke into a rousing version of the Drifters’ “Under the Boardwalk” before chowing down on a meal of pizza and saltwater taffy!

Vindy suffered his first losing outing, going 9-12-1 (41-34-1, 547) in Week Four. By the way, after meeting with the Russian leader in July, President Obama said he “looked Putin in the eye and I saw a reflection of JFK and....

(Now without 3G dead-zones)

Utah State over #20 BYU taking 24:
Coogs took out frustration of unbelievably bad loss to Florida State on the Rams, but were outdone in all statistical categories by Colorado State except rushing yardage and gave up 156 receiving yards to WR Tyson Liggett. USU lost by just 20 last season and though the Aggies are traveling on a short week, the distance is only 104 miles. State covered its first two road games this season, losing by 18 at Utah and just 8 at Texas A&M to bump its current ATS run to 6-0-1 and 16-8-2 over the past 2+ years (including an 11-5 spread record as a road dog). Will Coach Mendenhall care much about this one with trek to Sin City for a MWC game up next? Taking a few creative liberties with a June 09 Conan O’Brien joke...”In a recent speech, Benjamin Netanyahu called for the Palestinians to have their own state. Unfortunately, what the Israeli Prime Minister had in mind was...Utah State!” Aggies get the call in yet-another missionary melee...BYU 38 USU 17

#1 Florida:
IDLE (next @ Kentucky)

#2 Texas: IDLE (next vs. Colorado)

#3 Alabama over KENTUCKY giving 16 ½: Under Nick Saban, Tide is 5-3 laying points away from home and just 3-3 ATS facing teams from the SEC East. Kentucky mopped up the neutral gridiron with Miami-Ohio, but haven’t been impressive otherwise. ‘Bama travels to Oxford next week and QB McElroy ain’t Tim Tee-Shot, but... Alabama 34 KY 13

#18 (tie) GEORGIA over #4 Louisiana State giving 3: OK, ‘Dawgs have to actually cover a number here, but it’s a small one and Bengals appear ripe for a loss given near-misses at Washington and at Mississippi State, in which Tigers were +4 turnovers in narrow 4-point victory...Joja’ 23 LSU 17

UC-Davis @ #5 BOISE STATE: no line.

#6 Virginia Tech over DUKE giving 16 ½: Hokies ran for better than 5ypc vs. Miami and implemented the usual Beamer-Ball, scoring a TD on a punt return. Duke blasted Army on the Hudson, but that’s about it. Without blowout loss at Kansas earlier, Devils now have a lone cover in last ten vs. ranked teams and have scored 3, 14 and zippo the past three years against Tech....VT 37 Duke 13

#24 CAL over #7 Southern Cal taking 5: Can’t argue much with the line considering the Ducks limited Cal RB Jahvid Best to mere 55 yards rushing, but the Troy offense is struggling under direction of its freshman QB Barkley, as evidenced by almost 34-minute scoring drought vs. Wazzou following early 20-point 1st Quarter lead. Third road game in four weeks for USC, who will miss it’s leading scorer, RB Johnson, who is out after a freak weightlifting accident. We expect a low-scoring affair...USC 13 Bears 10

#17 MIAMI over #8 Oklahoma taking 7 ½: Status of Sooners’ Heisman Trophy candidate QB, Sam Bradford, for this one is unknown. Per Marc Lawrence’s Playbook.Com, Miami is 4-1 ATS following Virginia Tech, but three of those games resulted in SU losses at Joja’ Tech, Boston College and Maryland. Okie defense has posted consecutive shutouts vs. Tulsa and I-AA Idaho State and Tech held Jacory Harris to 150 yards and a pick, but Sooners are just 2-4 ATS in last 6 taking on other Top 25 teams...OK 24 ‘Canes 20

#9 Ohio State over INDIANA giving 17: We waffled on this choice. Buckeyes on 3-0 spread run and have back-to-back shutouts. Hoosiers 3-1 SU and have already matched last season’s win total, limiting three of four foes to 21 or less after yielding 42 points twice by this time last year. Best guess for “wish I had it back”, but we like the Ohio State to grab a few turnovers and keep Terrell Pryor on a short field...OSU 30 Indy 10

MIAMI-OHIO over #10 Cincinnati taking 29: Bearkats haven’t beaten anybody in the I-A ranks by this many since early October 2007. Redhawks (0-4 ATS) have been white-washed twice already to-date, but have to post a spread win at some point right? Why not in their first home game of 2009? Both teams will throw a lot. Cincy pass D is better, but not significantly...UC 34 Miami-Ohhhhhhhhh, noooooooooooooooo 7

#11 TCU over Southern Methodist giving 28: Toads get a home game sandwiched between last week’s winning visit to Clemson and next week’s trip to Air Force for the conference opener. Frogs outdid Clemson in everything but flags and punts to capture nice four-point win and keep the BCS buster talk alive. Ponies lost 48-7 last year, are currently 2-10 ATS on the non-conference road and barely got by I-AA Stephen F. Austin and UAB...TCU 42 SMU 10

UTEP over #12 Houston taking 16 ½: Upstart Cougars will find themselves swapping scores with UTEP squad ( whose only score vs. Texas was first quarter INT return) who lost 42-37 two years ago and 34-31 last season in El Paso. UTEP is crapshoot-worthy 8-8 ATS vs. rest of Conference USA the past two seasons (1-3 overall this year). Both teams are pass-heavy with average defenses...Houston 34 Miners 24

#13 IOWA over Arkansas State giving 21: Red Wolves coming off tough home loss to Troy. Hawkeyes took advantage of four turnovers by the Lions to get big road win and should face little resistance here...Iowa 33 ASU 7

#14 Oklahoma State: IDLE (next @ Texas A&M)

#15 Penn State over ILLINOIS giving 7: LOCK OF DA’ WEEK. Seven days after being nearly locked-against, Penn State gets Vindy’s vote for best call in one of just four games away from Happy Valley this season. Illini QB Juice Williams, a force last year, has been unable to carry his team by himself and Lions did lead Iowa for three quarters before special teams and QB Daryl Clark came unraveled. State responded to 2008's loss to Iowa by whacking (though not covering against) Indiana, who was +35...Alma Mater 27 Illinois 10

#16 OREGON over Washington State giving 32 ½: Ducks have put together two solids wins after stumblin’, bumblin’ and tumblin’ early on and have looked much more like the team everyone expected in Eugene. Cougars got a cover against floundering USC offense with six total points and smoke & mirrors...Decoys 51 Wazzou 13

#18 (tie) Kansas: IDLE (next vs. Iowa State)

#21 Mississippi over VANDERBILT giving 8: Rebels minor-upset loss to South Carolina coulda’ been worse as dropped passes and penalties plagued the Gamecocks in the red zone a few times. Admirals have covered 7 of 8, winning outright over Ole Miss 31-14 in ‘07 and 23-17 in ‘08 (behind a +4 turnover ratio). Third away tilt in four games for the Rebels...Mississippi 20 Vandy 10

#22 Michigan over MICHIGAN STATE taking 2: Wolverines have been living right in going 3-1 against the line this season behind a couple late comebacks, including last week over Indiana, who won all the categories except final score despite having a RB and WR both over 100 yards. Sparty lost at home to Central Michigan and dropped a pair of shootouts at Notre Dame and Wisconsin. UM wants to avenge last year’s 35-21 loss. They will...Big Blue 35 MSU 31

#23 Nebraska: IDLE (next @ Missouri 10/8)

#25 Georgia Tech over MISSISSIPPI STATE giving 6: This got a long, hard look for lock pick. Bees did nice job playing keep-away from North Carolina, holding the ball for more than 42 minutes while having nearly two backs rush for over 100 yards each. ‘Jackets ripped State last year 38-7. The Bulldogs have improved 25 points since then???!!! MSU almost took out LSU, but we can’t see that kinda’ effort here...Tech 24 Miss State 14

“Unnnnnnderrrrr the boarrrrrrrdwalk, down by the seeeeeeeeeeeeeeaa.
On a blanket with Vin’s bookieeeeeeeeeeeeee...
is where I’lllllllllllllllllllllllll beee...”

Michael Vick was finally eligible to play a live down last week, but during his provisional reinstatement, he was prohibited from attending games of UDUB, UConn and Northern Illinois Huskies, or Joja’, Fresno State or Weeziana Tech Bulldogs. In fact, just to be safe, the Fightin’ Blue Hens of Delaware, Gamecocks of South Carolina and even the Rhode Island Terriers filed a temporary restraining order!

The NFL is allowing teams to trade-in older, salary-cap guzzling wide-outs whose best years are behind them in exchange for up to 4500 reception yards. It’s being called...”Catch for Clunkers!”

This week’s lunch-special.... “The Offside”. Side dishes are brought to the table before the main entree is delivered. The customer gets $5 off the bill and the waiter is forced to retake the order!

That stack of cash with the eyeballs on it???!!! That’s just the money the Weber Kid could be saving with GEICO. (Poor little fella. He’s probably been back there picking up blitzing linebackers all game.) ...”Vin always feeeeeeeeeels like...somebody’s waaaaaaaaaaaatchin’ hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiimmm!”

Black Shirt: The highly-coveted ebony tee goes to Houston QB Case Keenum for the 4-yard TD run with 49 seconds left that preserved a push against (GASP!)Texas Tech! The Cougar triggerman edged out Nitwit Lion QB Daryl Clark, whose three second-half INTs led to the rally that allowed Iowa to not only cover the spread, but also to beat the alma mater outright and Hawkeyes DL Adrian Clayborn, who blocked a PSU punt and returned it for a TD!

“Locked in a Box?”: Colorado State could not stay close enough to an angry bunch of Mormons, dropping the lock record to 2-2 (.500)

Shoppe Talk: Texas continues to graze at the Bar-V Ranch after chalking up a fourth straight forecast loss (0-4, .000). Hanging out in the gulf off the Shoppe coast are the Tropical Depressions of Miami at 0-3 (.000)! On the opposite end of the spectrum are the Joja’ ‘Dawgs, who’ve posted four forecast wins in as many tries!

Vindy’s Week 5 Best Bets: Last Week: 3-1 Season: 8-8 (.500)
SYRACUSE +6 ½ over South Florida, IOWA STATE -3 over Kansas State, Tulsa -16 over RICE, Auburn +2 over TENNESSEE

Vindicator needs to go update his status on a well-known social-networking site that’s popular among sports-gamblers...Facebookie!

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