Thursday, October 08, 2020

Vindy's Picks Week 6-2020


LAS VEGAS, Nevada (AP)… Back in May 20, the Pensacola Blue Wahoos offered-up their home-game venue as an AirBnB for a mere $1500 per night, limiting the number of occupants to the requisite ten. Said-buyers could use the clubhouse, batting-cages and the diamond itself! Taking a clue from the Minnesota Twins Double-A club, the Vegas Vindicator put his own two-story, three-bedroom, two-and-a-half bath Sin City home up-fer-short-term-availability, complete with black-light posters and lava-lamps, at a more-modest $79.99 per night cost, which includes the amenity of the U.S. infectious-disease aficionado, devout Nationals’ fan Dr. Anthony Fauci, who reportedly, overjoyed after Vindy’s phone-call, recruiting him to the cause, spent “hours-and-hours and hours” practicing throws with help from Washington’s soon to-be-released pitching coach Paul Menhart, began locating everything from hard-sliders to knuckleballs inside the strike-zone! Nonetheless, a few early-guests brave-enough to step-up to the doormat at the patio-entrance and got unintentionally-plunked with autographed, sanitized and masked softballs were immediately upgraded to the highly-coveted “’I Must Be in the Front-Rowwww'" Bob Uecker- Suite". 

Our 3-2 outing last Saturday has us clinging to a treading-water-worthy 10-8 (.555). But the “best bets” are en fuego (See our Between Da’ Hashmarks segment below). Only a dozen games involving ranked-squads this fortnight, so slim-pickin's, but as election-season gets underway, we’re drawin’ offside-penalties fer runnin’ undebated to da’ quarterback with...

(Sponsored this week by Verizon Wireless 5G-String coverage!) 

#7 Miami (+14) over #1 CLEMSON: First significant-opposition for CU, having dispatched Wake Forest, I-AA Citadel and Virginia (who outgained Clemson on the ground in 18-point loss). Marc Lawrence noted the ‘Noles have 22-consecutive conference triumphs by average margin of nearly 33 ppg. Tigers put-away Wake and aforementioned-Wahoos by 24 and 18, respectively. We think Miami is at least 3-points better than the Cavs and show 12th-best rushing yards in the country and are just a bridesmaid behind Virginia Tech in the ACC at 232.3 ypg. ‘Canes come in at 3-0SU/ATS, besting perennial Fun-Belt championship-contender UAB, Louisville (on the road) and rival-FSU (decisively!). Most-recent history shows Tigers bashing Miami 38-3 in 2017, so there’s plenty of bulletin-board material in Coral Gables. Pelicans were idle last week and got additional days to game-plan for QB Spicoli. Closer than expected...Fast-Times at Ridgemont High 31 “Da’ U” 24 

#4 Florida (-6 ½) over #21 TEXAS A&M: Florida enters this one with a pair of relatively-easy home wins in the books (1-1 ATS, with double-digit lines in both cases). Our theory about the Baggies keepin’ da’ playbook close-to-da’ vest and peeking ahead to ‘Bama in 17-12 win against Vandy didn’t pan-out. Last meeting was 19-17 TAMU victory in da’ Swamp in 2017. Crocs went 4-7 outright that year. We see no viable reason to not give less-than-a full-TD here with the visitor...Neck-Gaiters 33 A&M 20 

Arkansas @ #13 AUBURN (“under 48”): Final-tallies for the four games-played of the contestants show 47, 42, 35 and 33. Tigers managed only a pair of FGs vs. Joja’. Pigs posted nominally-better 10 against the ‘Dawgs. This is more a vote versus Auburn than for da’ Pork Chops. Maybe the upset of Mississippi State, only Arkansas’ second SEC win in 25 tries, will inspire better-things in Fayetteville (maybe not!). Bacon is permitting 25.5 ppg-against... 5th-best in SEC-play. Aubie allows 20 ppg in conference-tilts. Auburn has scored at-will the past three years, hanging-up 50 or more in two of those. Having said that, the Bulldogs did likewise before falling this time...Tigers 26 “Go Pig or Go Home!”

Texas-San Antonio @ #15 BYU (“under 63”): Best guess for “wish we had it back”. Possible look-ahead spot to Houston for BYU, so we’re not willing to lay the five touchdowns. Coogs (3-0 SU/ATS) have permitted just 24 total points over first three matches in routs of Navy, Troy and Weeziana Tech. Roadrunners (3-1 SU/2-1 ATS) helped us cash a parlay last weekend with mere 8-point loss at UAB. Brigham Young is rockin’ the scoreboard for north of 49 ppg, second in the country, behind only Texas. UTSA coughs-up 34.6 ppg in I-A play, but we’re relying on the Mormons’ stop-squad...BYU 41 “Beep Beep!” 13 

#22 Texas vs. Oklahoma (@ Dallas, TX) (“over 72 ½”): Uggggh. Combined, the teams are 3-3 outright this early in the season and 1-4 against the line. Both sides had late opportunities to salvage victories, but went down last week anyway. Scoring-D's have been non-existent the past two matches, with Texas yielding 89 points and Spooners giving up 75. Marc Lawrence noted the Norman club sucked dirty-pond water in RZ defense at #128 nationally in 2019. Historically-speaking, Oklahoma has taken three of past four on the scoreboard, with final totals alternating years between 80’s and high-fitties/low-sixties. If the pattern continues, this one finishes easily above the number. Cattle have covered seven-straight in the series, but got double-digits in all of ‘em. Given the collective pedestrian-results for these two, this contest has been renamed the “Red River Shoe-Horn"!...Boomer Stupor 44 Burnt ‘L’Orange 37 


BTW, the aforementioned “home-plate” wasn’t the standard five-sided 17-inch wide “dish” seen in da’ “batter’s box”, but was rather a circular piece of Vindy’s personal dinnerware! Concessionaires offered cocktail-wieners on tiny buns with the usual condiments! 

The traditional rosin bags have been replaced by bottles of hand-sanitizer behind the pitchers-of-beer-mound. Just wonderin’ if hurlers will eventually figure-out how to use that gel/fluid to their advantage and “doctor” the baseball! 

Notable trends thus-far: Boston College 3-0 “under”, Duke 0-4 SU. Kansas 0-3 SU/ATS with 3-0 “under”, Sudden Mist 1-3 SU/ATS with 3-1 “over”, Texas State 1-3 SU/3-1 ATS with 3-1 “under” and Weeziana-Cornrow 0-4 SU/ 1-3 ATS with 3-1 “under”. 

Shout-out to Coastal Carolina! Chants (that’s short fer Chanticleers [some sorta’ roosters or sumthin’]) look like the real-deal at 3-0 SU (includin’ victories over Kansas [again!] and perennial Stun Belt-contender Arkansas State) and helped us cash a parlay in Week 5! Poultry almost got our vote (and still might) to pull-off the upset at # 23 UL-Lafayette next Wednesday! Wouldn’t be shocked. Stay tuned! 

Pandemic conditions led the nation’s governors to impose certain restrictions on retail and restaurant services, which in turn, led football teams to create a new position on defense, known as the curbside-linebacker! 

Some members of our prognostic team held a private forecasting workout while it was supposed to be on lockdown due to COVID issues. As a result, the Nevada Gaming Control Board will make Vindy forfeit any correct predictions this weekend. 

Hopin’ to make a few extra bucks for the upcoming holidays, for a nominal fee, we’re offerin’ to don your fave-team's uniform and lay across yer windshield as a sunshade! 

Given the number of games being postponed or cancelled, college and NFL teams are now keeping contests as scheduled using the 1968 Tudor Electronic Football Game, strategically-placing plastic-players-on-plastic sleds on a magnetic field! 

This week at #1 on the NY Times Best-Seller book list, John Bolton’s work...”The Locker Room Where It Happened”!!! 

If hockey meets current safety-assessments ahead of pre-game warm-ups, do we hear announcers say...”Ohhhhh! ... a temperature-check...and a beauty!” 

If basketball meets a certain ABBA hit..."There was something in the air-ball that night, the team-stars were bright...Fer-nannnn-do. They were shooting there fer you and me, a throw fer three...Fer-nannnn-do." 

Black Shirt: The Week Five Highly-Coveted Cloth goes to Tarheels’ DB Trey Morrison fer a late-INT on a Boston College two-point conversion effort with 45-seconds to-go that kept the game from going to OT and da’ total “under 54”, as we predicted! Honorable-mention to UNC-kicker fer missin’ a fitty-four-yard FG-attempt with sub-six-minutes left! 

Vindy’s Week 6 Best Bets: Last Week: 3-0 (Troy @ SOUTH ‘BAMA was postponed) Season: 11-3 (.786) 

SYRACUSE PK over Duke, Kansas State +8 ½ over TCU, TROY –7 ½ over TEXAS State, Temple @ NAVY “over 50 ½”

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