Friday, October 15, 2021

Vindy's Picks Week 7-2021

PROGNOSTICATOR JOINS MONETIZATION GAME 

LAS VEGAS, Nevada (AP)…Last month, the Washington Caps reportedly became the country’s first major-league athletic club to grant permission to advertising-rights to a sports-gambling-entity, ie. Caesar’s Sportsbook, to rent promotional-opportunities on its jerseys. In related news, failing to make a significant profit from his weekend-handicapping excursions, Vindicator cut a similar-deal with Pepto-Bismol, Chuck-E-Cheese pizza, Preparation-H and TV-station Nick Saban-at-Nite to position shameless-plugs on his game-day outfits to generate extra cash. 

 

The Ouija-board provided nominal-improvement (2-3) last Saturday, but still kept us submerged at an overall season-record of 14-16 (.467).

 

In July, Jill Biden had surgery to remove then-unknown remnants from an unknown object that punctured her foot while strolling on a Hawaiian beach. Turns out the First Lady stepped on a draft-version of... 


THE WEBER KID’S 2021 WEEK 7 FORECAST  

(Currently da’ butt of trending dad-jokes!) 


SAT. OCT. 16 


#11 Kentucky (+23) over #1 GEORGIA: Best guess fer “wish we had it back”. Despite youth at the skills, ‘Dawgs have shown no sign of a chink in the armor, but strange things have happened to teams recently at the top of the battin’-order. Gotta’ figure Wildcats have sufficient game-film to plan fer Joja’. UGA, in Athens, has plenty of room to get reserves significant live-fire game-time here facin’ yet-more Top 25 opposition. Wildcats entered year as Phil Steele’s #11 Most-Improved-Team and went down by 17, 21 and 14 in previous three meetings. Feral Felines are undefeated in six opportunities in ‘21 and 5-0 ATS. Mere 28-23 win over FCS Chattanooga is concerning, but not much. Joja’s thrown a pair of shut-outs and allows 5.5 ppg to-date. UGA’s trio of ranked-contestants have fallen to the combined tune of 81-13, including 37-zip over Arkansas and 34-10 over Auburn. Channeling Lee Corso, we assert...”Not so fast, my friends!” None of the five previous national title winners have knocked off Top 25 opponents by more than 20 three times in any of those campaigns in the regular-season (ie. prior to the conference-crown match, in fact, just 3 times in collective 4 tries)...Georgia 29 Blue-Grass Kitties 17  


Texas Christian (+13 ½) over #4 OKLAHOMA: LOCK OF DA’ WEEK. This line got our attention immediately (“Under 68” got a good, hard look from us too.). Okies rose-up from three-TD hole to take yet another crazy, track-meet contest outright last week and we anticipate a slow-start here, possibly on the shoulders of a second-stringer, who led OU to its “second-largest comeback in program history” after Heisman-wanna'-be QB Spencer Radler...er...um...Rattler...(sorry, still in Oktoberfest-mode...Radler bier is a German adult-beverage made with a combo of pils [standard German brewski] and lemon-lime soda [a la Sprite]) was directed to grab some pine in light of his not-quite-hardware-worthy performance up to that point. We’re bucking a trend that shows Oklahoma going 3-0SU/2-1 ATS following the last three years of the Red River Chaupin. Toads are young on offense, seasoned on D and are uninspiring 1-2-1 ATS in ‘21 lined games but have covered 4 of last 5 vs. the Top 25 entering the year. Another too-close-fer-comfort outcome for Norman Nation...Blooper Bloomers 31 Kermits 27 


#10 Michigan State (-5) over INDIANA: Two teams going opposite directions. State’s success has been a little surprising while Indy’s grinding halt also was unexpected. MSU having the country’s best rusher in Kenneth Walker III (who should eclipse 1000 yards on the ground this week) and a veteran O-line has certainly worked to State’s advantage, boosting average yards of offense from last season’s 330 ypg to current 486.8 ypg. Undefeated Sparty has covered 4 of 5 lined games, including 31-13 road win at Rutgers. Hoosiers lost respectably by 6 to likely Group of Five NY6 participant Cincinnati, but their best victory was a 33-31 squeaker at home over Western Kentucky (BTW, State bounced those same Hilltoppers by 17). Indy coughs-up 28.2 ppg, good for 13th in the Big Tenderizer, just ahead of last-place Maryland (29 ppg). The visitors will don the all-white “Stormtrooper” unis for this one. (Yes, we know the prevailing joke is that said-soldiers couldn’t hit anything!). The “Old Brass Spittoon” goes back to...Michigan State 31 IU 17 


#18 Arizona State (PK) over UTAH: Second-choice fer “lock”. We peeked, a long time, at the “under fitty-one" as well. Started as ASU –1, but now a “pick ‘em” (or even the host minus-1 by kick-off) as the public piles-on the last thing they saw. Kudos to da’ Utes fer besting a struggling-USC club last week at the Coliseum for the first time in over a century!  ASU, returning to the Top 25 after a brief absence, is top-heavy in experience on defense and QB Jayden Daniels’ throwin’ a ratio of 4 scores and 3 picks suggests Pitchforks will rely on the ground-game (note: Daniels is also a threat to use his legs) and burn clock. ASU played last Friday and got an extra day to prep. State has conceded a paltry 16.2 ppg, whereas the Mormons have allowed an additional score-per-contest at 23 ppg (how they hit Aztecs fer 31 is still a mystery) ...Sun Devils 24 Utah 19 


BOSTON COLLEGE (+3) over #22 NC State: Little voice in our head “Screa-min’ Ea-gles”! (Sorry...flash-back to our military days, no tie to football, but in any case, much-respect fer the Hunnerd-First Airborne!). Another tilt we heavily-reviewed “under” fitty-one! Both sides hit da’ field after week-long vacays. Atlantic-Division supremacy is in play following Clemson’s falter. State might just peer-into-da-future with mecca to Miami in light of Pelicans 44-41 triumph in ‘20. Iggles won most-recent melee 45-24. ‘Pack now 8-3 ATS in ACC. “Cheers” is now 18-8-1 vs. conference-competition of-late and shoulda’ displaced Clemson (as previously-noted). BC got seduced into exchangin’ scores with UMess and Mizzou and Wolfpack did likewise with Weeziana-Tech. Statistically-speakin', it’s a dart-throw. Backin’ the home-puppy... BC 24 NCSU 20 


BETWEEN THE HASHMARKS 


BTW, “under da’ salary-cap-space", in a quid-pro-quo arrangement, NHL said the fab-forecaster could boast his predictions on league- prescribed-sweaters fer perennial bottom-feeder Buffalo Sabres (who haven’t made the 50% of league-teams that each go to the playoffs in 11 years!)

 

Fer all BIG10s and-porpoises, said-conference took Week 7 off! 


A few days ago, the country (Nevada notwithstanding) celebrated Christopher Columbus taking the Nina, the Pinta and the Santa Maria on a water-borne journey, in 1492, across Lake Erie and then down Rt. 71 (don’t ask!) to discover da’ Horseshoe!

 

Two weekends ago, Jon Gruden referred to the locker room at SoFi Stadium as “bizarre”, further noting, “It’s like a maze.” Given the time of year, we instantly had visions of Jack Nicholson chasing the recently-exited coach with an axe through the labyrinth-like topiary at the Overlook Hotel toward the end of “The Shining”!

 

Was it just us or did anyone else think the Seattle Seahawks florescent-colored unis worn during the game vs. the Rams made it look like someone simply emptied a box of yellow highlighters on the field???!!!! 


Just wonderin’ if a certain controversial offensive guard for da’ Las Vegas Raiders gets the benefit of the Richie Incognito Installment from State Farm??!! 


With the MLB Playoff happening, we ask if baseball meets a sea-faring reality TV show, is it...”Below the On-Deck Circle Sailing Yacht”??!!  


If a musical-based reality TV show meets a defensive football-strategy, is it...”Clash of Da’ Cover-2 Bands”???!!! 


On Monday, a North Korean soldier dressed in bright-blue Spandex stood-out like a sore-thumb in a line-up of otherwise olive-clad jet-pilots in a photo-op in Pyongyang. Somewhere, the DPRK Olympic speed-skating team was down a guy at practice for the ‘22 Winter Games!

 

We caught a commercial on the telly this week plugging UTI.edu. We have no idea why anyone would want to further his/her higher-schooling at an institution whose abbreviation stands for Urinary Tract Infection, with an over-sized bottle of cranberry juice as its likely team-mascot! 


Black Shirt: The bodacious bodice goes to SMU quarterback Tanner Mordecai for a lost fumble that was returned fer a score by Navy, putting the Middies up 21-7 mid-2nd Quarter! Honorable mention to Sudzu QB Jordan Brookshire for an incomplete pass on 4th-and-2 at the Lobos 26, keeping the Aztecs off the board en route to the predicted “under 42 ½”. Ditto fer New Mexico triggerman Terry Wilson fer tossin’ a pick at San Diego State’s 1-yard-line late in the first-half!

  

“Locked in Box”: We absorbed our initial “lock” defeat last week as Mi-SS-I-ss-I-pp-I (sorry, flashbacks to grade-school!) couldn’t maintain enough distance between it and the Seven Debris’ of Kevin-Fried Bacon, lowering the tally to 5-1 (.833). 


“Wish We Had It Back”: We wanna’ mulligan, fer assertin our “lock of da’ week” “Mississippi (-6) over #13 Arkansas” selection last Saturday, but also proposin’ “Under fitty-six-and-a-half" looks attractive as well...”!

 

Shoppe Talk: We decorate Ye Olde Taxidermy Shoppe with stuffed Rebels after Ol’ Missed (0-2, .000) hosed us fer the second time in as many weeks. 


Vindy’s Week 6 Best Bets: Last Week: 2-2 Season: 13-11-1 (.542)

 

Rutgers +2 over NORTHWESTERN, Colorado State -10 ½ over NEW MEXICO, Western Kentucky –12 ½ over OLD DOMINION, Rice @ UTSA “over 53 ½”