CLINTON TAKES ONE FOR THE TEAM(S)
WASHINGTON, District of Columbia (CNN)…Protecting the Commander-in-Chief, Hillary Clinton threw herself on a live political grenade, declaring the terrorist strike in Libya to be “my bad”. The Secretary of State then surprisingly copped to her failures to prevent the 2012 Olympic women’s badminton snafu, Bobby Petrino’s affair and motorcycle crash, Seattle’s “Hail Mary TD” win over Green Bay, the Cleveland Browns and Lance Armstrong’s use of PEDs. While pundits suggested she torpedoed any potential future runs for the Oval Office, NCAA athletic directors and NFL team owners across the country said such contriteness opens the opportunity for Clinton to become the first female head football coach at the FBS or NFL level, and representatives from several squads are reportedly seeking permission from the White House to contact Clinton about current or anticipated vacancies!
Following an okay 12-9 (72-69, .510) for Week Eight, we show off our binder full of linemen and…
THE WEBER KID’S 2012 WEEK 9 FORECAST
(More uncomfortable than Floyd Mayweather’s jail cell!)
THURS. OCT. 25
#14 Clemson (-12) over WAKE FOREST: Tigers 29 Deacons 14
FRI. OCT. 26
#16 LOUISVILLE (-3 ½) over Cincinnati: Cincy was upset last week by Toledo, who grabbed a 29-23 triumph without the benefit of an offensive touchdown, and UC dropped outta’ the Top 25. Teddy Bridgewater, one of top passers in the country, and the Cards edged a reeling South Florida team on a late scoring pass. Louisville still playing very-competitive games, with five straight decided by 10 or less (and four by seven or fewer). Cincy has owned this series four consecutive years, winning last year 25-16 while Birds were in the midst of a 1-4 SU demise …Louisville 17 Bearkats 10
SAT.OCT. 27
#13 Mississippi State (+23 ½) over #1 ALABAMA: LOCK OF DA’ WEEK. Tide better be careful here. Bulldogs will be up for this one, while Elephants might be peeking to next week’s trek to Death Valley. It was interesting to note McCarron’s 306 passing yards in win over Tennessee considering solid running game at ‘Bama’s disposal. Look for the QB to return to simple game-management mode vs. State team that defends the pass well… ‘Bama 30 MSU 16
Colorado (+45 ½) over #2 OREGON: This got a serious look for “lock”. ‘Bison had as many turnovers as points (six) last week vs. the Trojans. If they spent this week practicing ball security, Drakes will no doubt let ‘em hit paydirt a couple times. With that team from L.A. on the horizon, it’s a classic look-ahead for…Mallards 52 Buffaloed 14
#3 Florida (-6 ½) over #12 Georgia (@ Jacksonville, FL): Penalties continue to pile-up for the Gators (see our stat of da’ week below), but didn’t hurt ‘em in laugher over Carolina. ‘Dawgs held on during the final four minutes vs. Kentucky, who almost caught Joja’ sleepin’. Battle of wills as defense-minded Florida (allowing just north of 12 ppg) tries to corral UGA (scoring almost 40 ppg). Last two years have featured nail-biters, with Gators winning 34-31 in 2010 and Bulldogs rebounding in 2011 with a 24-20 victory. Dawg Pound not a good wager vs. Top 25, covering just 3 of last 14 and giving Florida the SU win in 7 of last 10 years…Crocs 19 UGA 10
#15 Texas Tech (+7) over #4 KANSAS STATE: KSU 30 Tech 26
#5 Notre Dame (+10 ½) over #8 OKLAHOMA: UPSET PICK OF DA' WEEK. Sooners are surging with 3-0 SU/ATS run in which they’ve outscored Texas Tech, Texas and Kansas 156-48. Irish went scoreless in the final 12 minutes, but preserved 17-14 home win vs. desperate Cougars. The ND ground game was instrumental as the quarterbacks did little. Leprechauns will need a similar output here in another match-up of polar-opposites…ND allows 9.4 ppg. Sooners lighting it up for better than fitty per game of late. OK on 11-6 home chalk run against Division I-A teams. We’ll favor Catholics’ overall strength-of-schedule thus far and say…Notre Dame 27 Okie-Doke 24
#6 LSU: IDLE (next vs. Alabama)
#7 Oregon State (-4) over WASHINGTON: Beavers 24 UDUB 14
PENN STATE (PK) over #9 Ohio State: We’ll call this a Brig 10 match-up since neither club is eligible for a bowl due to sanctions. Lions, as the home squad, will wear the horizontal black-and-white stripes, while Buckeyes will take the field in the visiting orange jumpsuits! In mid-September, it looked like it was gonna’ be a losing season in Happy Valley. Now the Lions have a legitimate shot to win this and Buckeyes have looked vulnerable three of the past four games, were lucky to beat Purdue in extra frames last week and may start a banged-up quarterback. OSU has beaten all three teams to whom it lost in 2011. Lions and Wolverines are the remaining clubs in that category. Again, we look first to the “under” despite consecutive “overs” by the alma mater…We Are 13 OSU 10
#10 Southern Cal @ ARIZONA (+6 ½): USC 37 AZ 24
Duke (+28) over #11 FLORIDA STATE: Since getting bashed at Stanford in early September, Blue Devils have won five of six games straight-up, including 33-30 upset last week over North Carolina as 10-point dog, and should come into Tallahassee with some confidence. ‘Noles beat Miami, but are on 1-4 ATS skid. Duke needs one more win to be eligible for first potential bowl-berth since 1994. Devils scored 21 or more just four times in 2011. They’ve posted 33 or better six times already this year. We like the ‘dog with four touchdowns…FSU 37 Duke 14
#17 SOUTH CAROLINA (-14) over Tennessee: Gamehens put the Gators victory on a silver platter much the way the Wolverines rolled over early vs. Alabama, and that comedy-of-errors had us tuning away from CBS and into the Friday the 13th marathon on AMC PDQ. Granted, Marcus Lattimore was not completely healthy, but special teams baked da’ Chicken in the 1st Quarter. Rocky Top made a game of the first-half vs. same Crimson Tide last week, but again, old habits die hard and Vols faltered late to give Tide the cover. Marc Lawrence’s Playbook.Com notes the road club in this one has covered 13 of 15, but we’ll give the coaching and talent edges to Carolina…Poultry 38 UT 13
Kent State @ #18 RUTGERS (-13 ½): We agonized over this one and have no faith in this call…Rutgers 24 Kent State 17
#19 STANFORD (-24) over Washington State: Stanford 41 Wazzou 13
#20 Michigan (+2 ½) over NEBRASKA: Michigan 23 Big Dread 17
#21 Boise State (-16 ½) over WYOMING: Cowpokes only SU dubya came by 3 at Idaho. Broncos let UNLV cover 27-point line with a late defensive score. Wyoming’s three home defeats this year are by total of 6 points (but include losses to defense-challenged Toledo and AA Cal Poly). Wyoming has a middle-of-the-pack offense and is bottom or near-bottom in all other Mountain Jest statistical categories. Not good news facing conference’s top D and nationally-ranked scoring D. Cowboys’ coach Dave Christensen will sit this one out in the wake of some unkind words for Air Force coach Troy Calhoun and his military tenure at the end of the one-point loss two weeks ago. We watched the video of the incident and think Big Dave was just acknowledging his interest in the F-Bomber-22! As an olive branch to the NCAA, Wyoming will be led here by Tom Cruise, reprising his role as Maverick in Top Gun (yes, we know those were Navy pilots), who will inspire the home-club with a pregame speech imploring the boys to “never leave yer Wing-T man!”…BSU 31 Cowpokes 10
AUBURN (+14) over #22 Texas A&M: Aggies 27 War Eagle 19
#23 Ohio (-6 ½) @ MIAMI-OHIO: How good does season-opening road win at Beaver Stadium look right about now for da’ undefeated Bobblecats???!!! Both sides allowing way more points-against than last year’s versions did, with each yielding about 33 ppg over last three MAC games and are combined 3-9 ATS. Redhawks let Cincy bang da’ board for 52. We’re giving the nod to OU’s rushing game over Miami-O’s offense. Line appears to be mighty close…’Cats 41 Birds 34
#24 Louisiana Tech (-30) over NEW MEXICO STATE: Bulldogs 49 NMSU 14
#25 West Virginia: IDLE (next vs. TCU)
BETWEEN THE HASHMARKS
BTW, Hillary continued to embrace her role as fall-guy (fall-gal?) and later offered mia culpas for Sam Fickens’ missed-kicks, Vindy’s Weeks 3 and 4 Picks, and in a pre-emptive strike, any possible Lindsay Lohan-Charlie Sheen love-child!
In July, Clinton finished a 13-day whirlwind tour of France, Afghanistan, Japan, Mongolia, Vietnam, Laos, Cambodia, Egypt and Israel…or what the NCAA will refer to next season as…the Big East Conference!
College pigskin stat of da’ week…Florida, Florida State and Florida International currently rank 109 (7.0), 110 (8.0) and 114 (8.4), respectively, in penalties per game. Can’t spell “flag” without “F-L-A”!!!! There is historical precedent, however, as Ponce De Leon, who discovered the Sunshine State in 1513, woulda’ got there five years sooner had it not been for the “illegal formation call” (too many boats on the line-of-scrimmage)!
Speaking of yellow hankies, we can’t wait for the first one to get thrown in Lions-Buckeyes game and hear the referee say, “Holding…number 49628713 on the offense…ten-year penalty…still First-Down!”
“Tebowing” is now trade-marked???!!! “Pay to pray”???!!! So, under da’ same logic, Heisman gets a cut every time some collegian strikes da’ pose???!!! Come to think of it, so does Madonna???!!!
A certain New Zealand berg is changing its official name to “The Middle of Middle-Earth” in honor of the December premiere of “The Hobbit”. Ironically, last season’s national titlist and opening-BCS poll number one, Alabama, is altering the hometown handle to “The Center of the BCS”!!! (“‘Bama College Supremacy”???!!!)
Black Shirt: Goes to Texas Tech (GASP!) QB Seth Doege for six (count ‘em, six!) TD passes vs. TCU, including last one in third-overtime to win and cover!
“Locked in a Box?”: The Beavers got it done vs. Utah, raising our lock tally to 2-6 (.250).
Shoppe Talk: Da’ ‘Eers, Red Raiders (GASP!) and Seminoles all showed up on the right side of the spread, but the Trojans re-announce their presence to go to 1-5 (.167)!
Vindy’s Week 9 Best Bets: Last Week: 4-2 Season: 20-19 (.513)
Ball State -6 over ARMY, NC State +7 over NORTH CAROLINA, Western Kentucky -7 over Florida International, Syracuse +3 over SOUTH FLORIDA
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