COMMUNICATION GAFFE PRODUCES BIZARRE GAME-DAY OCCUPANCY
ATLANTA, Georgia (BBC)…Following a garbled-request to put “fans in the stands”, Bobby Dodd Stadium saw a boat-load of rotary-oscillators throughout the venue ahead of Georgia Tech’s game versus top-ranked Clemson on Saturday. Officials for the “Wramblin’ Wreck” received multiple responses to its request-for-contract to “fill the stands with fans”, with a local Home Depot low-balling the amount and being granted the opportunity. Not known for its cardboard-likenesses, the DYI company did what it was expected and inaccurately packed the stadium with actual rotary-oscillators as opposed to likenesses of Yellow-Jackets supporters and enthusiasts. Undaunted, students of the school, known for its engineering-program, even rigged ceiling-fans above some of the seats!
Week 7 kept us behind-the-chains with another 2-3 finish (14-14, .500), but ya’ cashed tickets if ya’ went with any of our “best bets”, currently hitting at a torrid-pace of nearly-82%!!!!. Hopin’ da’ fecal-material doesn’t make contact with da’ rotary-oscillator during...
THE WEBER KID’S 2020 WEEK 8 FORECAST
(Called-out as “expired” by that aunt in the GEICO commercial!)
SAT. OCT. 24
Syracuse @ #1 CLEMSON (“under 61 ½”): Can’t see Clemson looking-ahead to visit by Boston College, but while perfect 5-0 W-L record, it’s only a coin-toss 2-2 against the line, and this (-46) is a big line! Syracuse is averaging 19.6 points-scored per game so far, and just 16-total away from home. Tigers took no prisoners while humiliating Joja’ Tech 73-7. Even da’ cardboard-concessionaire suited-up for a couple snaps on offense (and was credited with a “pancake-block”!). Tigers are now 17-4-1 ATS in ACC-play the last two-plus seasons. Contests of 2017 and 2018 were unexpectedly-close, with Orange taking a 27-24 decision in 2017 and CU grabbing 27-23 victory in 2018 ahead of 41-6 demolition by Clemson in 2019. Based on Marc Lawrence’s records, Syracuse has covered 7 of last 8 getting more than 6 following a double-digit demise vs. a non-conference squad (Citrus got squeezed 38-21 last week by Fun Belt contender Liberty). ‘Cuse could be Tigers’ second-shut-out victim on the year... Clemson 51 Duck Sauce 3
Indiana (+6 ½) over #7 PENN STATE: Surely, those of ya among the loyal-readership didn’t think we were
gonna’ exclude da’ Nifty Lions from da’ forecast in their inaugural-game of the season, didja’?! (Altogether now...”Yes, we did! And don’t call us Shirley!”). Last two match-ups have been tight, with State winning 33-28 in 2018 and 34-27 last season. Hoosiers bring back 17 starters from 2019 squad that increased scoring by 6 ppg and decreased points-against by a six-pack as well. Lions have a truckload of new coaches and Marc Lawrence’s Playbook.Com recommends taking Indy here. We usually take it in da’ shorts when we go against da’ Alma Mater, but in light of the “Twilight-Zone”-season to-date, we wouldn’t rule-out the upset...WE ARE! (We hope!) 28 Indiana 24
#16 SMU (+2 ½) over #10 Cincinnati: In all honesty, this one’s a match we’d really rather watch than wager-on and most likely-candidate for “wish”-pick. Sufferin’ Masochist hosed us in Week 7 (toppling Tulane in extras by 3 as 6 ½-point chalk), but we’re willing to try again! ‘Kats benefitted (?) from an unscheduled bye-week when game at Tulsa was pushed-out. Both sides are unblemished outright, but we prefer SMU’s recent-triumphs over Memphis and Tulane more than Cincy’s dubyas vs. FCS Austin Peay, Army and South Florida, all at home. Last meeting saw Ponies win 30-27 three years ago...Hobby-Horses 30 Cincy 24
Kansas (+19 ½) over #19 KANSAS STATE: Bluebirds have a lone cover and no dubyas in four appearances, coughing-up Coastal Carolina’s victory that propelled the Chants to their current spot in the Top 25. No room to brag, State dropped the opener to Stun Belt’s Red Wolves. All four games of that quad finished “over” and above this total (48 ½).’Cats, who are off a bye-week, show largest MOV as 10. KU is now 8-4-1 getting points on the road the past 2+ seasons (1-1 in 2020) and lost by 10 in 2017 and by 4 last time here in 2018, before 28-point demise in 2019 (covering two of those three). Kansas all-purp-yardage leader, RB Pooka Williams, opted-out of the season this week, but his numbers aren’t staggering enough to have a significant impact. A homer ahead of trek to Morgantown allows K-State to substitute reserves liberally and if Les Miles second-year charges have any pride, they bring it here. BTW, we may rue not selecting the “over 48 ½” instead... Purple Persians 37 Aviary 23
#24 COASTAL CAROLINA (-6) over Georgia Southern: Undefeated Chanticleers, under third-year coach Jamey Chadwell, have knocked-off Kansas for the second-time in as many years, upended solid Stun Belt clubs Arkansas State and Weeziana-Lafayette (last Wednesday away from home) and smoked I-AA Campbell by 29. Fightin’ Roosters (Gamebirds?) have three-upsets in as many underdog-chances. Chants are in revenge-mode for 30-27 loss in Statesboro, that in the midst of a 2-6 skid to close-out 2019, kept them from bowl-eligibility. Eagles slipped by Campbell 27-26 and fell by 2 at the Ragin’ Cajuns. Ridin’ da’ hot-hand...Coastal Carolina 41 Joja’ Sumthin’ 27
BETWEEN THE HASHMARKS
BTW, Fathead took it one step-further and placed two-dimensional replicas of the air-blowing devices throughout Mountaineer Field at Morgantown, West Virginia prior to the ‘Eers’ contest against Kansas!
If "Family Matters" meets an Indiana Hoosiers loss, would we hear Steve Urkel quip..."Did I-U do thaaaaaaaaat??!!"
Notable trends among teams that have played a minimum of five FBS foes...Boston College 4-1 “under”, Duke 1-5 SU, Joja’ Tech 4-1 “over”, Middle Tennessee 1-5 SU, Navy 4-1 “over”, NC State 4-1 SU/ATS, SMU 5-0 SU, Syracuse 1-4 SU, UAB 4-1 SU, Weeziana-Monroe 0-5 SU/1-4 ATS and Western Kentucky 1-4 SU/0-5 ATS.
Following-up Week 6 Lead Story (again!)...In late July, President Trump fabricated an invite to throw-out the first-pitch by the local MLB club in an effort to one-up Fauci, calling-upon a tradition going back decades. Vindy spies confirmed Stormy Daniels was the POTUS’ plus-1. In fact, George Washington was invited to do likewise, but declined the offer, noting he was busy preparing for the crossing of the Delaware River!
Former Raiders’ home-venue Oakland-Alameda County Coliseum was famous for its collective obnoxious and costumed fan-sections known as the “Black Hole”. Apparently, that tradition will continue with the new Vegas-edition at Allegiant Stadium and will be appropriately-called the...“Blackjack Hole”!
Newly-anointed Buccaneers’ QB Tom Brady was rousted from a Tampa Bay park after being caught working-out in violation of Florida’s stay-at-home orders. Does this make the G.O.A.T. “The Greatest of All-Trespassers"???!!!
In related news, we’re wonderin’ if Brady’s pass, while inside the pocket, didn’t go beyond the city-line-of-scrimmage?!
Let's face it...the Coronavirus pandemic opened the door for a viable defense for opposing-pitchers that threw chin-music or actually plunked Astros’ hitters because they were “just practicing social-distancing"!
With the 2020 Major League Baseball championship underway, we remind the readership that in 2019, Olympic gymnast Simone Biles successfully-completed a back-flip on the rubber before tossin’-out da’ inaugural-pitch of the World-Serious (raise yer hand if ya remember that commercial!) Game Two! Honorin’ that event, on Vin’s subsequent-trip to the sportsbook, he asked a fellow-bettor to “hold our shot-glass” and pulled-off a cartwheel prior to placin’ a wager on this week’s menu! The “routine” drew scores of 9.0, 9.5 and 6.2 by the American judges in the dug-out, generating an investigation into Russian-hacking!
On Friday, October 23, musician/performer Drake turns 33-years-old. Given the notoriety of said-musician's “kiss-of-death" for any team for which he cheers, we elected to send a text to the school-in-question instead, wishing “good fortune” to the Bulldogs in their college-hoops campaign!
Wish We Had It Back: We’d like a mulligan on our call of Sudden Mascarpone –6 ½ over TULANE after noting... “SMU’s 31-24 victory over Texas State gives us pause... Mustangs have won last three in the series, but by just 4 the last time they played in N’awlins. Tulane has covered last five in the home-dog role, winning three of ‘em outright.”
Black Shirt: The tremendous-tee this week goes to Miami Hurricanes K Jose Borregales for a 37-yard FG, the only score of the final-stanza, with just over 4 minutes left, that let Da’ U cover –10 ½, ultimately victorious by a dozen!
Vindy’s Week 8 Best Bets: Last Week: 4-0! Season: 18-4 (.818)
Georgia Tech @ BOSTON COLLEGE “under 54 ½”, Rutgers @ MICHIGAN STATE “under 44 ½”, Tulane +20 over CENTRAL FLORIDA, TEXAS-SAN ANTONIO +2 over Weeziana Tech
No comments:
Post a Comment