FAMOUS
AUDIBLE NOT WHAT WE THOUGHT WE HEARD
DENVER,
Colorado (REUTERS)…Much ado was made over Peyton Manning’s
use of the word “Omaha” at the line of scrimmage, reportedly captured in a
league video-compilation as many as 44 times, in his team’s January playoff win
over the San Diego Chargers. Players on both sides, however, revealed the star
QB was actually shouting the expression of shock and bewilderment, “Omigawd!
Omigawd!” after looking over the defense!
BTW, CB-radio aficionados will of course remember
Manning as the voice of “Rubber Duck’ in the song “Convoy”…”Yeah, 10-4, Big
Ben…what’s yer 20?...Omaha?!...Well,
they ought to know what to do with them hogs out there fer sure…”
A horrendous 3-12 (.200) outta’ the gate had us
quickly contemplating closing up shop and takin’ the rest of the season off,
but we’ve Picasso’d ourselves up off
da’ canvas and hope for better results from…
THE
WEBER KID’S 2014 WEEK 2 FORECAST
(Safe
as a Sochi Olympics half-pipe!)
Citadel
@ #1 FLORIDA STATE: No line.
Florida
Atlantic (+40) over #2 ALABAMA: Mounties’ 100-yard
kick-off return for a score in the Second Quarter sounds like several
’Bama special-teams scholarships being vacated. Owls gave up almost 500 rushing yards on fitty-seven carries in
blowout loss to Nebraska and now fly into Tuscaloosa, facing Tide team that saw
RBs Yeldon and Henry each clear 100 yards on the ground vs. West Virginia. Yep,
that’s gonna’ leave a bruise…Tide 48
FAU 10
#7
Michigan State (+12 ½) over #3 OREGON: UPSET PICK OF DA’ WEEK #1. LOCK OF DA’
WEEK. We’ll put more stock in Spartans’ 45-7 win over
then-FCS #8 Jacksonville State team than in Ducks hanging 62 on AA South Dakota
squad. Mallards QB Mariota warrants his Heisman-talk, but Sparty closed last
year with underdog SU wins over Ohio State and Stanford. Ducks are crapshoots
as home-chalk. One of Oregon’s defeats last season came at the hands of
defensive-stalwart Stanford. Double-digits just too-good to pass up with State…
MSU 27 Quack Attack 24
#4
Oklahoma (-24 ½) over TULSA: Sooners 44 Tulsa 16
#5
AUBURN (-31) over San Jose State: Tigers 44 SJSU 9
#6
Georgia: IDLE (next @ South Carolina)
#8
OHIO STATE (-12) over Virginia Tech: State’s 17-point win
over Navy is misleading. We watched the game. Middies were in it until the last
8 or 9 minutes. While the rushing attack is obviously Navy’s MO, the Ensigns
gashed the Buckeyes run-D for long-gainers on several occasions. QB JT Barrett did improve as the game went on in place
of Braxton Miller. A missed 36-yard FG cost us the forecast win last week, but
considering a number of calls by the
replay official favoring the Boat People, we won’t complain too loud. Buckeyes are just 8-7 ATS at
Da’ Shoe the past seasons, but should fare better vs. a more-traditional
offense this week…State 29 Hokies 12
Lamar
@ #9 TEXAS A&M: No line.
Northwestern
State @ #10 BAYLOR: No line.
Memphis
(+24) over #11 UCLA: Bruins
D did the heavy-lifting last week in Virginia, scoring three TDs on three
turnovers, with UCLA offense not hittin’ the scoreboard until the final 90
seconds of the game…UCLA 35 Tigers 24
Sam
Houston State @ #12 LSU: No line.
#13
STANFORD (-3) over #14 Southern Cal: Just prior to last
week’s opener vs. Fresno State, Trojans DB Josh Shaw fessed up that his story
about his high-ankle sprains resulted from leaping off a balcony to save his drowning nephew was…horse
hockey! The exact details of his actual fall from a balcony were not divulged,
but Vindy’s spies say Shaw had been watching Wrestlemania on TV and tried to emulate a “diving back elbow drop”. No turnbuckle was available, so he
improvised…landing a solid blow to the chest of his 7-year-old relative, but
bustin’ up his wheels in the process! Frankly, we’d be happy with a push, but
we’ll call it…Trees 24 Trojans 20
#15
Mississippi (-20) over Vanderbilt (@ Atlanta, GA): Senior
QB Bo Wallace and his Rebels teammates overcame a sloppy INT-filled game (7
total combined) to beat Boise and notch one of our three correct picks in Week
One. Meanwhile, the NCAA and SEC dropped anchor on Vandy’s now-banned unis,
which proclaimed “Anchors Down” on the back in the midst of the Commodores’
embarrassing 30-point loss to improving-but-not-that-improved Temple. Ole Miss chalked up 387 passing yards but the
running game was absent and the Rebels have won just 6 of last 16 SEC contests.
Vandy’s got a new coach after losing James Franklin to Vindy’s alma-mater…Rebels
41 Vanderbilt 17
Michigan
(+4 ½) over #16 NOTRE DAME: Despite the academic
drama, QB Golson carried the Leprechauns, literally, with three rushing scores,
and passed for a couple more in trashin’ Rice. Big Blew needs to figure out how
to put the close ones in the dubya-column, suffering 4 losses by 11 total
points last season and going 4-11-1 ATS in games decided by 7 or less the last
three years. Senior QB Devin Gardner avenged a much-publicized 2007 loss to
Appalachian State last week. Irish had won four straight (by 7 or less) until
UM’s 41-30 triumph in 2013… Leprechauns 27 UM 24
NEW
MEXICO (+26) over #17 Arizona State: Best guess for this
week’s “wish I had it back”. Lobos nearly rallied from 17-point halftime hole
vs. UTEP, using a strong running game (about 9 yards per carry), but
minus-three in turnover ratio didn’t help. New Mexico finally has a full
allotment of scholarship players, lotsa’ seniors and a third-year coach in Bob
Davie, though Lobos are down a couple key players…Pitchforks 38 UNM 20
Western
Illinois @ #18 WISCONSIN: No line.
McNeese
State @ #19 NEBRASKA: No line.
#20
Kansas State (-12 ½) over IOWA STATE: ‘Clones, as we warned
in our Week One “upset alert”, were beaten by the reigning FCS triple-champion North
Dakota State Golden Bison...not just narrowly, but by almost three touchdowns…at home!! The Purple
Persians can relate. They were beaten 24-21 last year by those same Golden
Bison. Dust Devils return 10 on offense but just half as many on D. ‘Cats have
been money-makers for their backers the last three seasons and have won 7 of 8
games following an ugly first half of 2013…
San
Diego State (+15) over #21 NORTH CAROLINA: Tarheels 27
Aztecs 20
East
Carolina (+16 ½) over #22 SOUTH CAROLINA: Poultry’s youth
on defense showed badly in outright loss to A&M last week (and maybe…just maybe…the Ol’ Ball-Coach won’t give the
Pirates any disparaging sound-bites). SC RB Davis is doubtful fer this game.
Can’t quite pull the upset trigger on
ECU squad that’s been poor in road-dog mode, but points look worthy…KFC 34
Arrrrgh! 27
SC
State @ #23 CLEMSON: No line.
TOLEDO
(+4 ½) over #24 Missouri: UPSET PICK OF DA’ WEEK #2. Rockets
31 Tigers 27
Murray
State @ #25 LOUISVILLE: No line.
BETWEEN
THE HASHMARKS
Apparently, the volume of penalty-flags thrown for
pass interference and defensive holding under the new regulations was so
numerous during the NFL exhibition season that cheerleaders on both sidelines
of any given game were seen sewing quilts with the yellow hankies at halftime!
Come to think of it, referees who watched too much of da’ World Cup coverage
were awarding penalty-kicks for defensive infractions occurring inside da’
tackle-box!
Having already suffered the egging of his truck last
year in the wake of a lost game (BTW, Justin
Bieber could not be reached for comment) and having his wheels set ablaze,
possibly intentionally, ahead of last Saturday’s game at Auburn, Arkansas QB
Brandon Allen was seen this week driving a tank
acquired from the Fayetteville National
Guard!
Replying to a media
question about UNLV-to-Arizona transfer Adonis Smith providing some intel about
the Rebels to his new team prior to their season openers in Tucson, UNLV coach
Bobby Hauck quipped, ”You are inferring that he was paying attention while he was here.” Given the Wildcats’ 58-13
victory, apparently, yes…yes, he was!
Eastern Michigan players struggled, while wielding
sledgehammers, to knock down a concrete wall to get to their sideline in their
opener last Saturday. “Mr. Gabriel…Mr.
Peter Gabriel…to the white
courtesy-phone, please!” We think there’s a Miley Cyrus Wreckin’ Ball parody comin’! On top of it, Eagles squeaked past AA
Morgan State 31-28. Will enlist Kool-Aid
to lead them onto the field this week! Might help bolster attendance too!
New signage in the Michigan State Spartans’ locker
room misspelled “accurate” after omitting the second “c”. We realize MSU ain’t
Harvard, Yale, Duke, Stanford or even Northwestern, but we an’t help but wonder
whih Mihigan State uarterbak will line-up under enter and help his team hit the
soreboard vs. the Duks this week!
In addition to aforementioned ISU Cyclowns, we put
several other teams on upset-alert
against their FCS opponents last week. None of those fell outright, though
Montana lost just 17-12 at Wyoming and Mizzou pulled away late from South
Dakota State. Other final scores of note from Week One
include…Bethune-Cookman’s 14-12 win over Florida International, NC State 24-23
over I-A newcomer Ga. Southern, Syracuse 27-26 (in double OT) over Villanova, Central
Michigan 20-16 over UT-Chattanooga, South Florida 36-31 over Western Carolina,
Iowa 31-23 over Northern Iowa and Texas Tech 42-35 over Central Arkansas!
This week on Upset Alert…Eastern Washington @
WASHINGTON (No line). The UDUB
defense hung on for the last 12 minutes to preserve 17-16 victory for
an ineffective Huskies offense at Hawaii. Sled Dogs do return starting quarterback Cyler Miles from suspension fer this
one, but still, the E-DUB Eagles are #2 in the FCS Poll this week…
With team captains for Super Bowl 48 at midfield for
the start of the game, Joe Namath prematurely tossed the coin. Kudos to referee
Terry McCauley for jumping the route and picking off the ceremonial currency
before it hit the ground. McCauley subsequently bolted down the left sideline
to the end zone, but was ruled outta’ bounds at the five. The officiating crew
would, however, go on to score the first of several touchdowns vs. the Broncos.
During the Sochi Games, snowboard athletes complained
about bumpy, deteriorating conditions of the Olympic halfpipe (though
competitors from Washington and Colorado noted “a half-pipe is better than no
pipe, duuuude”)
Black
Shirt: PSU kicker Sam Fickin for his last-second FG in
Ireland, leading to the alma-mater’s win and cover over Central Florida…and one
of Vindy’s “best bet” dubyas!
“Wish
I Had That One Back”: We wish we had damn-near any selection we made in Week One back,
but we specifically said we were “not comfy”
layin’ the limber with ‘Bama over West Virginia!
“Locked
in a Box?”: We open 1-0 (1.000) on the year as Ole
Miss put the hurt on Boise last Thursday! One of the few highlights of Week One
fer us.
Shoppe
Talk: The Gamecocks (0-1 season, 3-9, .250 skid back to
last year) host the season-opening of Ye
Olde Taxidermy Shoppe…not only failing to cover -10 ½ vs. A&M, but
having their tail-feathers handed to ‘em by the Aggies Fresno State was
actually 1-7 (.125) headin’ into the 2014 campaign and hosed us again to start
the year. Last year’s Flame-Throwers…‘Bama,
Oklahoma, Clemson… also hit us (but so did damn-near everybody on the slate
last week!)
Vindy’s
Week 2 Best Bets: Last
Week: 1-3 Season: 1-3 (.250)
JOJA’ STATE -1 over New Mexico State, NORTHWESTERN -7
over Northern Illinois, Akron +14 over PENN STATE, Colorado State +11 over
BOISE STATE
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