QB-MONIKER GARNERS ATTENTION
HOUGHTON, Michigan (AP)…Incoming-Frosh quarterback at Michigan Tech bears the name...Steele Fortress. With the okie-doke from the nationally-known football-tout Phil Steele, said-player is legally-changing his name to Phil Steele Fortress in exchange for a year’s-subscription to the famous-pundit's weekly publication. School-officials actually vetted the newbie’s player’s criminal-background to make sure he wasn’t Steal Fortress. Knowing his quarterback suffered through ongoing Man-of-Steele jokes growing-up, Steve Olson, coach of the Division III Huskies, referencing DC and Marvel comic-books heroes, rebooted a classic commercial, put his arm around Fortress’ shoulder and quipped...”Listen...Steele....you don’t happen to know any kids named Wayne, Stark, Banner, or Rogers, do ya???!!!”
Meanwhile back in Sin City, our odious oracle, drenched in “autumnal mead” gets to experience the “Punt-of-Misery” (altogether now...”Punt-of-Misery...Dilly! Dilly!”) after posting a 7-10 outing (21-27-1, .437). Interestingly, five of our seven forecast-dubyas came via love from last week’s Top Ten. Still gettin' booed less than Roger Goodell at the NFL Draft...
THE WEBER KID'S 2018 WEEK 4 FORECAST
(Still bein’ boycotted less than NIKE!)
FRI. SEPT. 21
ILLINOIS (+28) over #10 (tie): Nifty Lions 31 Illini 13
Florida Atlantic (+13 ½) over #16 CENTRAL FLORIDA: Owls rebounded from beat-down in Norman with home-victories over the Pilots and I-AA Bethune-Cookman. Atlantic boasts 10 back from D that improved points-against from 40 to 23 last season (though 27 to Air Force and 28 to da’ FCS Wildcats does not bode well!). FAU has been money-burner in last three Septembers with just a pair of covers...at Tulsa to open 2015 and in 2017 at Wisconsin. Knights got unexpected bye with game at UNC being cancelled for weather. Mythological reigning-champs rocked UConn and have not been tested to-date. They will be here...UCF 41 FAU 31
SAT. SEPT. 22
#1 ALABAMA (-26 ½) over #22 Texas A&M: Half our forecast six-game hole on the year is courtesy of going against Nick Saban & company three straight times. Fine, fine, fine. “Roll Thalidomide!”...’Bama 40 Aggies 10
#2 Georgia (-14) over MISSOURI: Tigers’ HC Barry Odom is now in his 3rd year, have 16 returning starters (including 6 linemen), have won their first three tries of 2018 and improved last season on run-D from 5.2 ypc to 4.0 ypc and 70 rypg. Mizzou suffered 28-27 loss here in 2016, but got whacked 53-28 “between da’ hedges” in 2017. ‘Dawgs are 3-0 SU/2-0 ATS, yielding a grand total of 24 points, have covered past 7 lined-games and are now 10-2 as road-chalk in last dozen opportunities...Canines 39 Felines 17
GEORGIA TECH (+16 ½) over #3 Clemson: Bees return to Da’ Hive in wake of consecutive SU/ATS defeats at South Florida (no surprise) and at Pitt (hmmm....) as small-faves in both. We mistakenly had Clemson facing Joja’ State rather than Joja’ Sudden. Not sure that woulda’ altered our selection, but the Panthers got smoked at Memphis, while CU (-35) won by just 31, sending it back to a certain section of our Between Da’ Hashmarks column! GT has gone 0-3 SU/0-2-1 ATS last three years vs. Clemson. Jackets got within inches of a “most-improved team” label by Phil Steele. Against our better-judgement...Clemson 27 Wreckage 16
Tulane (+36) over #4 OHIO STATE: Trip to Happy Valley looms for da’ Black-Eyed Peas. Nothing to be gained with style-points in Columbus vs. Tulane...Buckeyes 44 Emerald-City Wave 13
Army (+32) over #5 OKLAHOMA: Sooners stand-in at 14-5 last 3-plus seasons layin’ points in Norman (though 1-1 this season) and are conceding increasingly-more points each week (14, 21 and 27, respectively). Keydets 2-1 SU/ATS, logging back-to-back victories over FBS-newbie Liberty and upstart Hawaii. Army lost 38-7 in 2017 at Columbus in only recent tilt vs. a ranked foe. Soldiers own #6-spot (a tad lower than usual, but...) in rushing yards per contest. Gives us hope vs. #34-ranked rush-yardage stoppers at 116 ypg, even considering large-leads early in first three games, but now well-versed in option-pigskin...OK 44 Army 28
Louisiana Tech (+21) over #6 LSU: Let-down spot for Bengals off last-second win at Auburn and hosting Ole Missus next...Cajun Coogs 24 Hushpuppies 17
#7 Stanford (-1 ½) over #20 OREGON: LOCK OF DA’ WEEK. Even in a look-ahead situation, lack-luster 35-22 triumph over bottom-feeder San Jose State does not compel us to support the Mallards on the Pond. Trees were minus-2 here in 2016 and won by 25. RB Bryce Love, 100% or not, is expected to take da’ field. We like...Stanford 27 Afflaccck 20
WAKE FOREST (+7 ½) over #8 Notre Dame: UPSET ALERT. Irish’s three matches have been decided by 7, 8 and 5. Deacs opened with road-win at Tulane in extras, belted Towson and gave BC all they could handle. Leprechauns host big-rival Stanford on the horizon. Per Marc Lawrence, WF has won ATS in 12 of last 13 games in revenge-mode. Wake dropped a 48-37 track-meet in South Bend in 2017. Deacs are 10-0 in last 10 vs. the Top 25 and benefit from two extra-days to prep off Thursday-nighter. Deacons WR Freudenthal, who caught a late TD vs. BC, in our mind’s-eye, was actually Freud Dental...a place where patients go to get oral treatment for their edible-complex...Our Lady 26 Forest 24
#9 AUBURN (-29 ½) over Arkansas: Tigers 45 Pigs 9
Arizona State (+17 ½) over #10 (tie) WASHINGTON: “Over 50” was our second-choice here...Huskies 37 Pitchforks 27
#12 WEST VIRGINIA (-16) over Kansas State: Best guess for “Wish We Had It Back”. Crappy Purple Scions have lost by 1, 1 and 5 last three berths in this series and show 7-2 road-dog record past two seasons. ‘Eers made short-work of Tennessee and Y-Town State before what woulda’ been our “lock” (minus-3 at NC State) got cancelled. Manhattan Mousers slipped by FCS North Dakota 17-14 and fell by three-TDs to Mississippi State prior to rippin’ the UTSA Roadrunners. Fer Lord of Da’ Rings fans....West-By-Gollum Virginia 37 K-State 16
#13 Virginia Tech (-28) over OLD DOMINION: Old Dominatrix is one of the teams currently 0-fer-3 SU/ATS on the year. Expectations of a Phil Steele #6 Most-Improved Team have not materialized as ODU, one of Tech’s three shutout-victims last season, was embarrassed by I-A newbie Liberty, followed by tough-losses to FIU and at Charlotte, both as nominal-chalk. Forthcoming away-date in Durham won’t sway us from layin’ da’ four scores (as as opposed to “four-scores [and twenty years ago...]...”) with the Hokies...VT 49 ODU 7
KENTUCKY (+10) over #14 Mississippi State: Bulldogs 30 Bluegrass Bobtails 27
Texas Tech @ #15 OKLAHOMA STATE (“over 77 ½”): Cowpokes 51 “Guns Up” 44
#7 TEXAS (+3) over Texas Christian: MINOR UPSET PICK OF DA’ WEEK...Steers 27 Toads 24
IOWA (+4) over #18 Wisconsin: We’re just happy we kept our wallet in our pocket while contemplating a pre-season Badgers’ futures-National Title victory-wager! Channeling The Lucy Show, we quip “Wisssskkyyyy... you got some ‘splainin’ to doooo!”...Cheese-heads 19 Hawkeyes 17
Nebraska (+17 ½) over #19 MICHIGAN: The return of Scott Frost to his alma mater thus-far has been a bust in light of 0-2 SU/ATS start with close-losses, both at Memorial Stadium, to Colorado and...Troy! Recent trends support...and oppose...both sides...Harbaugh likely has more stock, but we’ll say the line is too hefty to diss Huskers. Fer Game of Thrones fans, if a certain-nuptial-massacre were held in Lincoln, would it have been remembered as the “Big Red Wedding”?!!! ...Big Blew 29 NU 20.
#21 MIAMI (-27 ½) over Florida International: ‘Canes 48 FIU 16
PURDUE (+6 ½) over #23 Boston College: UPSET PICK OF DA’ WEEK. Choo-Choos have yet to cover in hat-trick to-date and show a lone outright-triumph, but took Mizzou to the wire last week and have three defeats by 4, 1 and 3. Iggles fended-off serious second-half comeback-try by Wake Forest last Thursday...Purdue 27 BC 23
#24 Michigan State (-5) over INDIANA: Spartans 31 Hoosiers 23
McNeese State @ #25 BYU: No line.
BETWEEN THE HASHMARKS
BTW, multiple local Houghton breakfast-joints are now servin’-up Steele-Cut Oats.
Back in May, Joja’ QB Jake Fromm went to the ER with a fishing-lure in his leg. Meanwhile, da’ trout-in-question was credited with a tacklebox-fer-loss!
May also saw President Trump lauding West Point for capturing its first Commander-in-Chief's Trophy since ‘96. The POTUS joked (?) about creating a “Space Force”. Leading us to remember...the Thunderbirds? Fireball XL5?! Captain Scarlet & Da’ Mysterions???!!!
The Big Tenderfoot Conference went a mere 6-5 SU and 5-7 (and one no-line FCS-contest) ATS. Uggggghh!
Akin to the aforementioned ODU club, UTSA and Miami-Oh-No! also show 0-3 SU/ATS to-date, while the Prams (that’s British fer “baby-strollers”) of Colorado State are slightly-better at 1-3/1-3. On the other end of the spectrum are the Golden Gophers of Minnesota and da’ Maroon Mammoths of Alabama at 3-0 SU/ATS.
Marc Lawrence’s Playbook. Com recommends, in a battle of undefeated squads, backing the home-dog hosting an opponent allowing more than 14 ppg. This week’s qualifier...INDIANA +4 ½ vs. Michigan State (permitting 23.5 ppg).
If football collides with a Garth Brooks hit, would we hear...”I got ends in lowwwww places...”??!!
Just after the New Year, venerable NE Pats’ QB Tom Brady debuted a documentary called “Tom Vs. Time”. Personally, we’d be more-interested in a like-flick featuring Dr. Who in “Tom Vs. A Time-Lord" or involving classic tunes by David Bowie and Pink Floyd in “Major Tom Vs. Time”!!!!
Poland, this week, offered to call a locally-if-created U.S. military-base “Fort Trump”. Likewise, as the result of the Weber Kid’s former service, Vegas Valley-nearby stompin’-grounds Pahrump, Nevada, would allow a similar-establishment called Fort Vindicator, complete with an on-post sportsbook and a legal brothel!
Hooray Fer Da' Little Guy: In Week 3, we suggested FCS-unranked-but-27-votes-getter Rhode Island could drop UConn outright. It did just that...winning 56-49 in East Hartford! Elsewhere, Wyoming scored a TD with :17 to-play to rally and scrape by then-37 Wofford 17-14! Best chance fer the upset over the FBS-foe goes to...#15 Illinois State over COLORADO STATE and #16 Maine over CENTRAL MICHIGAN (who suffered seriously-bad loss to …(GASP!)...Kansas!
A bold-prediction fer three-team parlay this week, given frenetic-finishes in the waning-seconds of last weekend. For this week’s chalk....Weeziana Teck +21 over LSU, Eastern Michigan +11 over SAN DIEGO STATE and Buffalo +16 ½ over MINNESOTA (NFL). Ya heard it first, Sportsfans!
"Locked in a Box": Last Week: 0-0. After our West Virginia –3 over NC STATE call was wiped-away by Mother Nature ahead of publishing our picks, we neglected to tag another game as “lock”...D’OH!...leaving us at 1-1 (.500).
Black Shirt: Again, we split the coveted-cloth in half between Auburn K Daniel Carlson and LSU K Cole Tracy for each missing field goals that kept the total “under 44 ½”, as we predicted!
Shoppe Talk: We’re selling elephant tusks this week with ‘Bama piling-on at 0-3 (.000) thus-far in da’ 2018 campaign! Clemson (1-1, .500; 7-18-2, .280 over last 27 at-bats) returns as Vindy’s Kryptonite! Fer inquirin’-mimes that wanna’ know...Notre Dame and USC have Vindy’s six, both at 3-0 currently. Sadly, the Troy Boys prolly won’t show-up in the Picks anytime soon, having been dropped from the rankings.
Vindy's Week 4 Best Bets: Last Week: 1-3 Season: 6-6-1 (.500)
Notre Dame-WAKE FOREST “under 60 ½”, TOLEDO –10 over Nevada-Reno, Eastern Michigan +11 over SAN DIEGO STATE, Louisville @ VIRGINIA “under 54 ½”
No comments:
Post a Comment