LEAGUE RECONSIDERS OUTDOOR CONTEST
NEW YORK, New York (UPI)...National Hockey League officials are second-guessing the decision to play open-air venue games this season after February’s VGK-Colorado Avalanche contest on a manufactured-surface adjacent to Lake Tahoe, Nevada. While the match was well-received by NHL fans everywhere across the country and around the globe, Reno locals were less-than-pleased with collateral damage that occurred during the three periods. Errant twisted-wristers by players from both teams toppled multiple water-skiers, a paddle-boarder, several wind-surfers in addition to sinking a fishing-dingy, a canoe and a kayak.
A disappointing 1-3-1 outing (15-19-1, .441) has us mired in a 4-10-1 skid over the previous three weeks. Following a scarce-occurrence this past Sunday, in which the betting-public cleaned its bookies’ collective game-clock on NFL contests, the Golden Nugget sportsbook director said he simply had a serious-inclination “to lock myself in my room with a full bottle of Knob Creek”. Not our preferred-brand of adult beverages, but we were willing to learn and did likewise to expand our cultural horizons while working on...
THE WEBER KID’S 2021 WEEK 8 FORECAST
(Relying on forward-Progresso Soup to move da’ chains!)
SAT. OCT. 23
NAVY (+28) over #2 Cincinnati: Best guess fer “wish we had it back” mainly because, though ‘Kats are nicely-positioned as the maid-of-honor in the polls, we suspect Cincy will still have to pile-on from here-out to solidify a shot at the playoffs. UC has won 16 of last 17 tilts back to last year, dropping only a 3-point decision in da’ Peach Bowl to current front-runner Joja’. Middies are nominal points away from 5-2 ATS against ranked-opponents the past three campaigns. The combatants are basically equal in rushing and stopping the run. Advantage Queen City in the passing game. Last meeting, in 2018, went to Cincinnati 42-nuthin'. Ensigns hung-tough in this year’s defeats to Houston and SMU. Cincinnati has improved in penalty-yards-per game, reducing self-inflicted wounds by about a third from last season, though drew 9 hankies fer 74 yards in victory over floundering UCF Golden Knights last weekend...Cincy 31 Squid Game 16
Northwestern (+24) over #6 MICHIGAN: Wolverines took last week off. Following its usual slow start (‘20 notwithstanding), N-Dub “pulled level” at 3-3 SU with victory over the Scarlet Nyets (whose 3-0 start was an illusion). Wildcats have lost by more than this number just twice in past 3 and ½ seasons (including 56-7 at Nebraska a couple weeks ago). Spartans on-deck for UM, but Marc Lawrence notes the Wolverines have beaten the line 9 times in last 10 outings ahead of facing “Little Brother”. Northwestern has ended 5 of its past 6 seasons with a winning spread-record in conference play. Michigan has knocked off only a pair of MAC teams by this many in ‘21 and its B10 finishes show margins-of-victory by 7 over aforementioned Rutgers, 17 over poser-Badgers and 3 over Hobbling Huskers. Back in August, in a nod to da’ Wolverines, billionaire Jeff Bezos renamed his space-travel vessel to...Big Blue Origin!..Anne Boleyn Arbor 34 Felines 21
#8 Oklahoma State (+7 ½) over IOWA STATE: UPSET PICK OF DA’ WEEK. LOCK OF DA’ WEEK. ISU won’t be able to run the ball effectively, so Oklahoma State will need to pressure Brock Purdy, but Cyclones have permitted just six sacks to-date. OKSU came back to drop the Short-Horns last week and may be a little sluggish in the first half, leaning on RB Jaylen Warren (averaging 117.5 ypg) with QB Spencer Sanders recording an unispired 6-5 TD-to-INT ratio. While Okie-State permits less than 20 ppg and Iowa State coughs-up a grudging 16.3, there’s enough final totals between the two that suggests “over 47 ½” wouldn’t be a bad call either. Last four years in this series have been decided by 7 or fewer. A Top-25 squad getting more than a touchdown, even on the B12 tarmac, is appealing...Caballeros 31 Dust Devils 27
#16 Wake Forest @ ARMY (“under 52”): MINOR UPSET PICK OF DA’ WEEK. Puttin’ this one in the hands of the Soldiers’ ground-game (2nd nationally behind Air Force at 295 ypg) and nation-wide leading ability to control TOP (38.13 minutes per tilt). Deacs rested the fortnight comin’-in, Soldiers finished a bad-one 20-14 against struggling-Wisconsin 20-14. Army has tallied hat-trick of “unders” and over-all 26 of last 44 below this total (.591). Deacons have gone 1-6-1 against the spread laying points outside Winston-Salem and will have to throw because West Point grudgingly-concedes 78 rypg. If it comes down to a final FG, edge goes to Wake, but if not...Ring-Knockers 24 Poltergeist Priests 20
LOUISIANA TECH (+6) over #24 Texas-San Antonio: We’d also lean slightly toward the “over 58”. Wouldn’t be stunned by an outright upset. Shaolin-Belt teams doing well get very little press (at least in the local Las Vegas Review-Journal sports-section), so we wanted to give the 7-0 SU/5-1 ATS Autobahn Aviary some love here. Bulldogs went down 27-26 last season and have recorded, at 2-4 outright, demises by 1 at Mississippi State, by 2 vs. current-#21 SMU and 7 at current-#18 NC State to-date. The outlier? A 16-point loss at granted-it's-improved UTEP. Birds slid by O-fer-da'-year hometown heroes of UNLV 24-17. Recently lookin’ fer somethin’ completely-unrelated in our childhood attic, we stumbled across a Magic 8-Ball. We queried the plastic oracle-in-question if LT would cover the spread. The answer was “Reply hazy. Try again.” We did so...and got “Signs point-spread to yes.” Previously-unbeaten Pentacostal Carolina fell to unranked Aperitif State on Wednesday. Hmmmm...UTSA 34 Weeziana Tech 31
BETWEEN THE HASHMARKS
BTW, a secret U.S nuclear sub patrolling the body-of-water-in-question was dented enough to the point that it was scuttled by the crew and a nearby battleship went to full-alert after an inadvertent slap-shot across the bow!!
Tennessee fans littered the gridiron with trash, including golf-balls, late in the loss to Ole Miss, plunking Rebels’ coach Lane Kiffin in the progress. Hopin’ to avoid similar damage this weekend, ‘Bama staffers are plantin’ pins behind the Vols’ bench, luring Rocky Top-faithful into showerin’ their own guys with Wilson Top-Flights!
WTF Score-of-Da' Week: Weeziana-Cornrow (+32 ½) 31-28 over previously 5-1 SU/4-1 ATS Liberty???!!! One helluva’ homefield-advantage fer da’ Warhawks, wouldn’t ya say????!!!
Hooray Fer Da’ Little Guy: Salutin’ the Yale Bulldogs for hangin’-tough en route to 21-15 loss at UCondom on Saturday!
This week on SyFy’s “31 Days of Halloween” programming...”Night of Da’ Living Spread”!!!
Fer da’ Wisconsin Badgers fans who also know Rocky Horror Picture Show...”Say!...Any of you guys know how to...Madison???!!!”
If Reality TV meets the future of a Denver quarterback following his incarceration, is it “Life After Drew Lock-Up"!
If Christopher Lambert’s Mortal Kombat main-stay “god of thunder” character meets the Sin City NFL team; do we have the Las Vegas Raidens?
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If a Dallas Mavs/ Tokyo Olympics Slovenian Team hoops star meets a certain scene from The Godfather featurin’ a driver’s license wrapped in a bulletproof vest and seafood, do we hear “Luka Doncic sleeps with da’ fishes.”???!!!
Back in August, Olympic medals were awarded for sport-climbing???!!! Can’t wait for the 2024 Summer Games to watch competitive treehouse-building, zip-line racing, and the 400M Pogo-Stick!
Black Shirt: This week’s grandiose-garment goes to Kentucky WR Wan’Dale Robinson fer his 1-yard TD-catch with 4 ticks left vs. the ‘Dawgs to gift us the dubya vs. the push that woulda’ burdened us with an 0-3-2 tally. Honorable mention to MSU K Matt Coglin for an early 51-yard FG at Indiana that ultimately salvaged us a push rather than a loss.
“Locked in Box”: Horny Toads got their lily-pads handed to ‘em at Oklahoma, lowering the lock tally to 5-2 (.714)
Vindy’s Week 8 Best Bets: Last Week: 2-2 Season: 15-13-1 (.535)
Texas State +10 ½ over JOJA’ STATE, Kansas State @ TEXAS TECH “over 61”, New Mexico @ WYOMING “under 41”, Nevada-Reno +3 ½ over FRESNO STATE
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