GIANTS DEFENDER CREATIVELY DODGES SPECIAL TEAMS FLAG
EAST RUTHERFORD, New Jersey (REUTERS)...During their home clash last January versus the Philadelphia Eagles, New York Giants LB Cam Brown improvised to avoid a penalty for running into the kicker. Eagles' punter Braden Mann managed to get the punt away with the player crashing down on him and the defender’s momentum sent him hurtling toward the kicker, but Brown had the presence of mind to pull-up and simply embrace Mann in a hug, stymying officials from throwing a yellow-hankie. The linebacker was reportedly heard to reprise a certain beer commercial campaign, quipping “I love you, Mannnnn!”
We started well in Week 5, hitting our Friday night prediction, but alas, ended up just 3-2 (14-10-1 season, .583).
At a French fashion show in June, Katy Perry hit the runway donning a 100-foot train bearing her song lyrics. Vindicator recently took a lap around the sportsbook wearing an apparel-accoutrement of similar-length adorned with...
THE WEBER KID’S WEEK 6 FORECAST
(Takin’ da’ ice with an “active yard-stick"!)
FRI. OCT. 4
Syracuse (+6 ½) over #T25 UNLV: UPSET PICK OF DA’ WEEK. Congrats to the hometown heroes (4-0) for making their first-ever appearance in the AP Top 25 rankings but it’s gotten a bit outta’ hand! Rebels three I-A victims to-date show a cumulative 5-10 outright win-loss tally (5-15 if ya include FCS Utah Tech’s 0-5 [Trailblazers have been belted in all five]). Syracuse is 3-1 SU, with its only defeat coming in 26-24 loss versus Stanford. First roadie on the year for the ‘Cuse, 6-8 road dogs in past 14. UNLV has covered 8 of last 9 outside the Mountain Jest, but were getting points in four of ‘em. Orange has downed just one of its last 5 Top 25 foes, but is 13-5 SU/ 11-5-1 ATS in non-conference donnybrooks the past 3+ seasons and has a buttload of upperclassmen on both sides of the ball. Home team has left the game in the hands of Campbell (Atlantic Sun) transfer and dual-threat QB Hajj-Malik Williams, who carried the team nicely in romp over Fresno. Amidst Sin City villagers storming our mancave with torches and pitchforks (again!), we call...Orange 30 Running Rembrandts 27
SAT. OCT. 5
Iowa @ #3 OHIO STATE (“over 45”): LOCK OF DA’ WEEK. Possibility the Bucks could exceed this total themselves, but we’ll hope fer at least a little help from the 3-1 Hawkeyes, who were on a bye last week. OSU has so far won by margins of 46, 56, 35 and 31 and Iowa is on 0-7 ATS slide vs. last 7 Top 25 enemies, discouraging us from takin’ about three touchdowns here with the visitor. No shocker that Iowa’s scoring D has permitted just above 18 ppg, but the offense has risen up to bang the scoreboard for 32 ppg (29+ ppg discounting 40 vs. FCS Illinois State), showing 3-0 “over”. Marc Lawrence notes Aviary has beaten the line just once in seven tries with rest vs. an opponent off a SU/ATS victory. Last meeting was 2022 54-10 beatdown here by Ohio State...State 39 Birds 20
#9 Missouri @ #T25 TEXAS A&M (“under 48 ½”): Not unlike aforementioned Iowa, Tigers got a week-long liberty (freedom of live-fire games, not the CUSA institution!). We took-in the A&M contest vs. Arkansas. The ground game sucked in the first 30 minutes in spite of having the SEC top-rusher, but pulled it together late to hang on to beat the Hogs 21-17 and closed it out by a fumble-recovery with 90 seconds left bolstered by an Arkansas penalty-party (BTW, is it just us or does Arkansas HC Sam Pittman seriously resemble actor Brian Dennehey [antagonist in a number of “Rambo” flicks])?!! The Cadets’ scoring D is solid, yielding just 18 ppg. Mizzou is 2-1 “under” with the lone “over” barely exceeding the total in double-overtime and squeaked by Vandy 30-27 last week, but has already thrown two shutouts and is ceding just 12 ppg over its initial four tilts. A&M’s current 3-5-3 spread record vs. ranked opponents does not encourage us to even so much as confidently lay the trifling 2 points coin-change in this one. We’ll assume both clubs start the first half fatigued...TAMU 23 Big Cats 20
Baylor (+13) over #16 IOWA STATE: Second choice would be a lean slightly toward the “under 46” as well. Cyclones pulled off just their second defensive whitewash on the B12 tarmac in 53 years with 20-zip goose egg at Houston last week. State returns 19 starters and has opened 4-0SU/3-0 ATS and are grudgingly yielding 7 ppg. Not much trust on our part though as ISU is now 0-3 fer da’ forecast back to 2023. Bears are only 2-3 straight-up and have suffered back-to-back demises but were competitive in the trio of defeats (including losses by 11 at #11 Utah and 6 vs. #17 BYU. Bears have mixed experience on both sides of the ball. ‘Clones are generating almost 400 yards per game on offense. Baylor’s not far behind at 368 ypg. Dust Devils are permitting 255.3 ypg on D while Waco is showing 298 ypg. The differences don’t terribly justify an expected 12-point margin...State 24 Ursa Major 17
#22 LOUISVILLE (-6 ½) over Southern Methodist: Cards struck out in an arduous 31-24 decision at South Bend last week, turning it over three times. Assuming better ball-security here, we’ll lay the touchdown. Sudden Meteorology U. is 4-1, dropping only an 18-15 outing against currently-#17 BYU. Mustangs’ (4-1) points-scored and points permitted have been all over da’ board and are 1-5 getting points away from Dallas under 3rd-year HC Rhett Lasheed. Louisville is nifty 10-4 ATS as home faves the past 3+ seasons, covered 10 straight as chalk per Marc Lawrence and have posted a 2-0-1 spread tally in 2024. Steeds hold very negligible edge in the ground game over that of da’ Redbirds, but Da’ Ville averages nearly 300 ypg thru the air in comparison to 213 ypg for the visitor...Louisville 34 Pony Express 24
BETWEEN THE HASHMARKS
BTW, for inquiring mimes that wanna’ know, the Philly kicking specialist did not give up his Bud Light after the encounter!
Georgia was reportedly going to sport unis featuring horizontal black-and-white stripes, a la prison outfits, at ‘Bama. Didn’t actually occur, but woulda’ been amusing to watch a Joja’ quarterback attempt a pass to an official that had fallen and was laying on his side thinking it a Bulldogs’ receiver!
Given the absurdity of conference realignment geography and needing a couple more members by 2026, we think the PAC-Whatever should go after FCS powerhouses North Dakota State, South Dakota State and Villanova. How ‘bout Apparition State from the Stun Belt (Mountaineers have won at least nine games each season since 2015). Why not UMass? Every conference needs a doormat, right??!!
NC State recently brought a “breath work coach” into the fold. Not really sure what that position entails, but as a longtime fan of the Bloom County cartoon strip, Vindy hired himself a Burk Breathed coach.
Taylor Swift has referred to the hardcore football fans annoyed by her frequent broadcast appearances during her attendance at NFL games featuring boyfriend KC Chiefs TE Travis Kelce as “Dads, Brads and Chads” or what here at Vindy’s Picks prefer to call “Vlads,‘Nads and Cads!” Do we hear “Duds, Buds and Cruds”???!!! No truth to da’ rumor that producers will substitute shots of Swift with clips of Brad Majors from “Rocky Horror Picture Show” and “hanging chads” from the 2000 election controversy!
In February, Broncos QB Russell Wilson quipped “Over the next 5 years, I want to win 2 (Super Bowls).” Well, that oughta’ inspire his teammates! While a reasonable and realistic goal, it also says “Hey Dudes, we ain’t gonna’ take the Big Game in 3 of the next 5 seasons, so ya’ll just take a few plays off here and there.”
Prior to SB 58, we forked-over a few Sheckles on some Super Bowl Hollywood Football Squares. Point-values, 0-9, were assigned to any given 10 celebs (plus an alternate in case of illness, family emergency, etc.) on the gameshow. How the winner was determined after every quarter is still beyond us! The personalities-in-question included...Terry Fator (and one of his ventriloquist dummies), Simone Biles, Jim Carrey, Samuel L. Jackson, Martha Stewart, Johnny Depp, Pedro Pascal, Lady Gaga, Jackie Chan, Bill Shatner and Megan Markle). Participants were able to choose a square “for da’ blocked-kick”???!!!
In August 2023, Taylor Swift made it clear she was not gonna’ play during the intermission of Super Bowl 58, noting “Hi! It’s Me! I’m the Problem, it’s me!”. Days-later, the Vegas Vindicator did likewise!
This year’s Major League Playoffs are in-progress, reminding us of a late August ballgame in which Shohei Ohtani’s pet canine, Decoy, lugged a ball in his mouth from the pitcher’s mound straight to the waiting hands of his owner at home plate and offered-up a high-five. Onsite in L.A. for the contest against eventual AL East Titleist Baltimore, yer humble host, and longtime dog-lover, volunteered to “keep an eye on” the Dodgers’ star’s pup while Ohtani did his thing on the diamond. By the end of the nine innings, Vindy had trained the quick-learning pooch to tote a football, parlay card and tray of nachos simultaneously to the dugout...from the centerfield bleachers!
Olympic athletes traditionally bite their bling like they’re expecting Pop-Tarts, Moon Pies or chocolate chip cookies. Just once, we’d love to see one recoil in horror and pain after chompin’ on one made of aluminum foil!
In a world now fully-entrenched in “participation trophies”, the IOC has agreed to begin awarding lesser-metals medals, such as lead, nickel, tin, aluminum and copper! If ya don’t grab any hardware amongst those, then you really do suck at yer sport and should instead try Chinese checkers, “Mouse-Trap”, “Hungry Hungry Hippos”, Hopscotch, Jump-Rope, Red Rover, Hackey-Sack or Frisbee Golf!
Back in April, ESPN commentator Steve Levy during the first intermission report of the NHL Bruins/Penguins game referred to University of Denver college hockey champions as “Pios” (pronounced “Pyos” as in “Pioneers”). Hearing it initially, we thought he said “Pie-Holes”! OOPS!
If a James Bond classic meets a hockey net-minder, is it...”Goldtender”?!
Hooray fer Da’ Little Guy: As we suggested, UT-Martin knocked off Kennesaw State 24-13! No FBS/FCS this week.
Black Shirt: This week’s terrific tee goes to Alma Mater K Sander Sahaydak for botching two field goal tries, both from 40 yards, that would’ve enabled PSU to cover 18 ½ vs. Illinois! Honorable mention to Illini QB Luke Altmeyer for fumbling at the UI 33-yard line with 30 seconds left, leading the Nittany Lions to simply take a knee, up by 14, and run out the clock.
“Lock of Da’ Week”: Last Week: 0-1 Season: 3-2 (.600). Joja’ (-2) fell to a late Tide touchdown (though had that TD not happened, ‘Dawgs woulda’ gotten da’ ball back, up by 1, and woulda’ taken enuff knees to run out da’ clock anyhow), lowering our “lock” tally for the second consecutive week.
Shoppe Talk: If ya like pasta, Ye Olde Taxidermy Shoppe has a dinner special this week, featurin’ Joja’ Bulldawgs Bolognese! UGA’s now 1-4 (.200) back to last season.
Vindy’s Week 6 Best Bets: Last Week: 1-3 Season: 9-11 (.450). We’re throwin’ Magic 8 Balls covered in Velcro at a dartboard this week!
Boston College @ VIRGINIA “under 52”, Hawai’i @ SAN DIEGO STATE “under 48 ½”, Western Michigan -9 ½ over BALL STATE, Wake Forest +4 over NC STATE
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