DEM SNAGS TRY-OUT
BURLINGTON, Iowa (UPI)…A half-dozen pitches-in while taking a literal batting-stance this past weekend...to protest a plan to shut-down 42 minor-league baseball clubs, presidential-candidate Bernie Sanders caught the eye of a scout for the New York Mets, who offered the senator an opportunity to put his diamond-skills on display with a chance to join the Triple-A affiliate in Syracuse. A successful-outing could have the politician playing 1st Base or Designated-Hitter, and hitting “clean-up” ahead of ongoing Major League-hopeful and former gridiron-star Tim Tebow.
As the investigation of controversial hand-signals by a Cadet in the stands during the Army-Navy contest continues, we would ask those same folks to ferret-out the reason Navy allowed Army to block a 29-yard FG-chippie early in the 3rd Quarter that yer humble-host coulda’ split the uprights with and that woulda’ ultimately-resulted in the predicted “over 40” rather than the final “under”, and why West Point stuffed its offense back into a duffel-bag after scoring its lone-points at the end of the of the 1st-Quarter, leaving us at 0-1 on the weekend and 27-24 (.529) on the year.
A few days ahead of Christmas morning, under the tree, next to the Pickle-Me, Elmo, the Baby Shark plushy-drone, the Star Wars: The Rise of Herschel Walker fidget-spinner and the Line-to-Suzy Homemaker Oven (okay...we’re reachin’ with that one!), loyal readers will find a gift-wrapped copy of...
THE WEBER KID’S 2019-20 BOWL PREDICTIONS FORECAST: PART I
(Movin’ more before da’ snap than da’ Elf-On-Da'-Shelf!)
FRI. DEC. 20
TROPICAL SMOOTHIE CAFE FRISCO BOWL (@ Frisco, TX)
Kent State (+7) over Utah State: UPSET PICK OF DA’ WEEK. Flashes are one of the pleasant-surprises of 2019, having posted almost as many victories this year (6) as they had cumulatively the past three years (7). Kent State still struggles on defense, coughing up 31.1 ppg on the heels of 35 and 37 in 2017 and 2018, but has improved significantly on offense, especially recently, scoring at least 30 in each of 5 of last 6 games, and rides a 3-0SU/ATS streak. USU brought back just two starters on offense...and it showed...as scoring-production fell from 47 ppg last year to current 28.3. Following 11-2 record for 2018, Aggies suffered up-and-down 7-5 SU/5-5-1 ATS and show uninspiring 1-2 SU/ATS in last three year’s post-seasons. Bowl-’dogs who cover often win straight-up, particularly in the lower-tier...Golden Flashes 37 Utah State 34
SAT. DEC. 21
NEW MEXICO BOWL (@ Albuquerque, NM)
Central Michigan (+3 ½) over San Diego State: Chippies, behind a lotta’ upperclassmen, revived a program that went just 1-11 outright and sat idle for the 2018 post-season after sitting at home fer just second-time in seven tries, finished as MAC-conference runner-up in Jim McElwain’s inaugural-try as head coach! CMU hasn’t ended-up in the black and gone bowlin’ since 2012, yielding ‘14, ‘15, ‘16 and ‘17 to its opponents. Aztecs no bargain either, losing 42-35 track-meet to Army in 2017 and leaving the O in the locker-room during 27-0 white-wash by Ohio in 2018. State was the immovable-object, playing little offense and givin’-up...nuthin’...to the tune of 10-1 “under” (see our “best bets” below). Central Michigan dropped hard 26-21 decision vs. Miami-O in conference championship. “Backin’ da’ MAC” again this week...Chippewas 17 Sudzu 16
MITSUBISHI MOTORS LAS VEGAS BOWL (@ Las Vegas, NV)
Washington (-3 ½) over #18 Boise State: Broncos wanted the Group of Five berth in a NY6 bowl, not yet-another pre-New Year’s post-season game (in Sin City fer da’ second-time in three years...Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z) after the committee decided to put more stock in Memphis’ two-point loss at Temple than Boise’s three-point demise at BYU (as did yer humble narrator). Huskies, who dropped 3 of last 5 contests (by 4 vs. ranked Quack Attack, 5 against ranked Utah and 6 at Colorado), and “led” by Joja’-transfer Jacob Eason, sporting a 22-8 passing-TD-to-INT ratio (and will likely surpass 3000 passing-yards on the season), had a disappointing year and can finish on a positive-note by taking-out one of two Top 25-clubs playing prior to December 28. BSU allows more-than 234 passing-yards-per-game. Broncos’ 2018 bowl-game vs. Boston College was cancelled due to Mother Nature and UDUB hasn’t won a bowl outright since 2015 (0-3 SU after that), but we think motivation favors...Sled Dogs 31 Tater-Heads 23
MON. DEC. 23
BAD BOY MOWERS GASPARILLA BOWL (@ Tampa, FL)
Marshall (+17 ½) over Central Florida (61 ½): Golden Knights’ three-SU losses also represented the first time since 2013 that UCF suffered a trio of spread-losses as road-chalk en route to 4-7 overall ATS tally. After being willing to suggest they won the mythical national championship after undefeated 2017 season and losing its first game by 8 to LSU in last year’s bowl, Knights ended up as just another Group of Five also-ran and have nothing to motivate them here. We put no stock in 34-7 pounding of in-state rival Bulls to close-out the regular-season. Piggy-backing on a stat from Marc Lawrence, Central Florida has now posted 30 or more in 37 of past 38 contests. Herd has won and covered 6 consecutive bowls. All six of Marshall’s ATS-defeats came as favorites and only outright-loss by more than 11 was 52-14 demise at Cincinnati...UCF 34 Herd 30
THURS. DEC. 26
WALK-ON'S INDEPENDENCE BOWL (@ Shreveport, LA)
Louisiana Tech (+6) over Miami: There is nothing to like about the Pelicans here. Miami has failed to win or cover in five of last six post-season outings, and after facing Wisconsin the past two bowls, “step-down” in class to take-on CUSA’s Weeziana Tech (9-3 SU), who we admit, edged FCS Grambling State and Rice. ‘Canes’ players either quit, didn’t buy-in or had difficulties adjusting to 1st-year HC Manny Diaz’ guidance, granting now 3-9 Joja’ Tech one of its three wins in the home-digs of Hard Rock Stadium and losing vs. Florida International (plus almost three-TDs at the time) in Orlando. Said-Panthers lost by a dozen to Tech at Ruston. “Over fitty” might be worth a peek with Bulldogs showing 7 games above that total and Miami ending over that in another five. Locale likely finds more LT fans in the stands than backers of “Da’ U”...Tech 33 Miami 29
BETWEEN THE HASHMARKS
BTW, ex-MLB star Jose Canseco weighed-in on Sanders’ quest, noting he’d “keep a ‘roster-spot’ open” for the politician at his baseball-themed carwash in Vegas if “the election-thing doesn’t work out”!
On Bernie’s expedition, we quote Tom Hanks in “A League of Their Own” and assert...”There’s no voting in baseball”. Meanwhile, the elder-Democrat's campaign-manager, who truly played 2nd-Base for Harvard, tossed a couple practice-throws to the venerable-politician, who prevented a couple throws in the dirt by the former Big Red middle-infielder from going awry, and even made a nice full-length stretch to rob an opposing-player of an infield-hit!
As we approach a new decade, post-season sponsors have unanimously-agreed to abandon tradition and feature marching boy-bands during each halftime-show!
Stuff we meant to include in our Army-Navy edition...If a Drew Carey improv-comedy show meets Army sappers is it...”Whose Mine Is It, Anyway???!!!”
BTW, upon further-review, the Cadet-in-question copped to simply making the basketball-related sign for “three-goggles” and “just hadn’t raised (my) hands to (my) face” when the gesture was captured on video!
President Trump last week pooh-poohed Time Mag’s choice of Sweden’s teen Greta Thunberg as “Person of the Year”. Meanwhile, the Vindicator was runner-up and stated he’s “still in it for the NFL’s Walter Payton Man of the Year”!
Just wonderin’ if Le’Veon Bell’s score of 251 during his controversial kegel-adventure earlier this month qualifies the NY Jets RB as a “pro-bowl” candidate???!!!
Our best-guess fer most-entertaining game in the period-in-question? Brigham Young @ HAWAI’I!!!!!!
If a basketball player hits an opponent in the head with a bouquet of flowers, is it a Fragrant One foul??!!
Vindy’s Bowl Predictions Part I Best Bets: Last Week: 0-0 Season: 29-18 (.617)
Central Michigan-San Diego State “under 41”, Southern Methodist @ FLA ATLANTIC “under 70 ½”, Eastern Michigan (+11) over Pittsburgh
As we put out Internet-cookies and milk fer Santa, we wish all our loyal readers a Merry Christmas! We’ll back with Part II of our bowl-picks NLT December 26!
Now if you’ll excuse us, we’re off to da’ Big Apple to practice our part in the Macy’s Christmas Day Parade (which was, of course, the namesake of actor William H. Macy of Mystery Men and Shameless fame!
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