LATE SUB BEFUDDLED SELECTION SHOW VIEWERS
ATLANTA, Georgia (UPI)...Fans tuning-in to CBS to watch the announcement of Big Dance seedings back in March were thrown for a loop as Joe “Joey Brackets” Lunardi was suddenly sidelined by an undisclosed injury and replaced by celebrity look-a-like Ben Mankiewicz, host of a Turner Classic Movies series. College hoops aficionados immediately blew-up social-media platforms with their displeasure as the bracketology-guru-doppelganger rattled-off pairings of 68 retro-films, including #4 “Da’ Three-Point Musketeers” vs. #13 “Game-Plan From Planet 9” and #2 “Taxi Dribble-Drivers" vs. #15 Three-Points of Da’ Condor”.
In front of a film-noir background and hoistin’ a toast, Vin does his best Bogie-impersonation quippin’ “Here’s lookin’ at you, Sweetheart...” with...
THE WEBER KID’S 2021 WEEK 10 FORECAST
(Takin' the sportsbook-ice with an active-stick!)
SAT. NOV. 6
Louisiana State (+28 ½) over #3 ALABAMA: ‘Bama has brought hellfire-and-brimstone in the two games since loss at College Station and has beaten this number twice in past three years in the series, though strangely dropped a 46-41 decision last time here to the Felines in 2019. But now firmly entrenched in the catbird-seat as CFP #2, style-points basically become moot knowing victory over current #14 Auburn and potential SEC Championship win unseating #1 Joja’ are possible (assuming no untimely slip-ups by either team). Being played at Bryant-Denny, Saban should be able to liberally-insert any of the first-six-stringers after taking a substantial-lead. We looked at the “under 65”, but ‘Bama is second-nationally behind Ohio State, putting-up 45.9 ppg, with only Florida holding UA below 38, while allowing 41 to the Aggies and 29 at Gainesville. ‘Cats are scoring all-over-da-’board. D isn’t dismal, but have to take into account 42 each at Kentucky and to the Crocs 3 weeks ago, along with 38 at UCLA in the opener. The Baton Rouge Bobcats’ largest margin-of-defeat was by 21 at Lexington, State has a mighty-good shot at the backdoor-cover. If an assistant at Weeziana State, Weeziana-Lafayette or Weeziana-Cornrow gets moved up to Head Coach, do we hear Olivia Newton-John sing...”Hope-lessly...Pro-mot-eddddd...Bay-ou”???!!!!...“Jelly-Roll, Tide, Roll” 44 LSU 20
#7 Oregon @ WASHINGTON (“under 51”): UPSET ALERT. Our only selection this week in which we did not back the underdog. Sled Dogs got off to a poor beginning, falling to I-AA Montana followed by three-touchdown loss in Ann Arbor. At 4-4 SU to-date, Huskies can still make a bowl, assuming defeats here and the following Saturday vs. the Sun Devils, if they close-out the regular-season beating Colorado and Wazzou in the Apple Cup contest. History doesn’t quite support this call, with Ducks winning 30-27 in 2018 and 35-31 in 2019 (truncated ‘20 campaign saw no meeting between the two). Huskies are 6-1 “under” in ‘21 with just a pair og games finishing above the number (both nominally at 55 each). Mallards are 4-3 “under”. The caveat? The average ending number vs. FBS-competition so far is...60 (though minus maybe Cal, there have been no defensive juggernauts on the slate)! Both stop-squads are young, yet both are playing well-better than their experience-levels would portend. Rubber Duckies are allowing 23.3 ppg, Canines just 18.9...Oregon 23 UDUB 21
Navy (+21) over #8 NOTRE DAME: LOCK OF DA’ WEEK. Middies covered both matches vs. Top 25 opponents this year, going’ down by just 7 each against Cincinnati and SMU, and upset Tulsa on the road last week as a double-digit ‘dog. In fact, Ensigns are 6-4 ATS facing ranked foes in past three-plus seasons and are a total of 2 points away from 8-2 in that role. Sailors haven’t lost by more than 18 since mid-September 23-3 defeat vs. Air Force. Irish have topped only one contestant in ‘21 by more than 15 (trouncin’ da’ Badgers by 4 TDs on a neutral site). USN is absolute last in the country in passing yardage per game at 59, but 14th-nationally in rushing yardage per contest (FYI...USAF and Army come in at 1st and 2nd respectively). Leprechauns permit fair-to-middlin' 136.5 yards on the ground, 47th-best...Our Lady 30 Annapolis Armada 16
#10 Wake Forest (+2) over NORTH CAROLINA: MINOR UPSET PICK OF DA’ WEEK. We might very-well rue not goin’ with the “over 76 ½” instead. We tip our helmet to the Deacs for their first-ever AP top ten ranking, but they also conceded 127 cumulative-points to Louisville, Syracuse and Army in a three-match span, though none of the other five foes did not escape the teens, while posting #5-best nationally 43.4 ppg (even 39.28 ppg ignoring outlier-70 laid on West Point). Lines-makers might be invoking last season’s 59-53 UNC victory (also in Chapel Hill), putting revenge-factor in WF’s corner. Disregarding mere 10 scored on Virginia Tech in the opener, Tarheels are lightin’-it-up at north of 40 ppg, but permitted 205 total points to Virginia, Joja’ Tech FSU, Miami and Notre Dame (recording a 2-3 outright tally over that span) and who show victory over a team with decent pulse being at Virginia. UNC (4-4 SU to-date) gave-up just second of Seminoles’ three straight-up triumphs. History, as pointed out in his preseason mag, points out home-squad in the series has taken the scoreboard over previous past half-dozen and beaten the line seven in a row. We mistakenly called Army to upset Wake two weeks ago. This week, we believe in da’...Possessed Pastors 38 La Brea 34
#12 Auburn (+4 ½) over #13 TEXAS A&M: UPSET PICK OF DA’ WEEK. Welcome to November, da’ month when live-underdogs frequently pull-out the straight-up victories by hook, crook or favor of the college football pantheon! We considered the “under fitty” as well and almost made the dreaded “double-call” (side & total) on this game because throwin’ out the 34 the Tigers granted Joja’ and 38 allowed to ‘Bama by the Aggies (no shame in either of those), the duo grudgingly allows 20.6 ppg and 13 ppg, respectively elsewhere, making a damn-good argument to support the “below the total”. In light of defeats to Arkansas and Mississippi State by the host and 15-point SEC road win in Fayetteville by the visitor, gotta’ wonder if Tigers woulda’ been chalk here if not for Aggies’ 41-38 triumph over suspect-’Bama. Marc Lawrence noted A&M sucks dirty pond-water (our words, not his) following a bye, besting da’ line in mere two of last eighteen as such. Folks in Tuscaloosa will prolly cheer A&M since an Aubie triumph would diminish (slightly) Bama’s loss to the Aggies in the eyes of the CFP committee...War Eagle 23 Aggies 19
BETWEEN THE HASHMARKS
BTW, ICYMI …"Count-It and One Flew Over Da’ Cuckoo’s Nest” bested “Bunny and Clyde” in the national championship-game! (Meanwhile gridiron-titles on da’ Big Screen include...”The Cabin in the Ickey Woods” and “Invasion of the Student-Body-Right Snatchers!”)
Last February, Valparaiso dropped its Crusaders nickname, mascot and associated images due to use by supremacist groups. Your humble-narrator proudly leant his moniker to the cause of the Lutheran university and said-team is now known as the Valpo...Vindicators.
While we were sleeping...the Gilded Gerbils of Minnesota moved to the pinnacle of the Big Tonsilitis West at 4-1! How TF did that happen???!!!
In July, the Mountain Guessed media poll tabbed UNR as preseason conference #1 in the West Division with 141 points. UNLV was picked as last with a mere 26 points, 13-fewer than East Division cellar-dweller-predicted New Mexico! The Las Cruces Lobotomies are two-point faves over the Rebels on Saturday. Jus’ sayin’!
We turn our clocks back in the wee-hours of Sunday morning. Getting' an extra-hour in 2021 is like getting' an extra 4th-Down on any given possession by UConn, New Mexico State, UNLV or Arizona!
In October, the month in which most of the nation celebrates Columbus Day, a report was published suggesting the Vikings actually arrived in Newfoundland in 1021. In fact, the Vikes had already played-in and lost four Super Bowls by the time the usually-accredited Italian navigator and his fleet came to rest here in 1492.
Football fans rejoice! We’re in the midst of 27 (count ‘em, 27!) straight days in which at least one college or NFL gridiron game is being played!
If a defensive-player burdened by offensive-linemen rushes the opposing-passer, does he go “inundated to the quarterback”??!!!
Earlier this year, Alex Trebek’s passing led to a multiple-shuffling of guest-hosts for a famous game-show. Should LeBron James eventually get a like-appearance, will there be a double-double or triple-double-Jeopardy-round ???!!!
In July, a Seattle Aquarium octopus incorrectly forecast the local NHL expansion team Kraken choosin’ Red Wings’ D-Man Dennis Chowloski. A piece of paper secured to a salmon at the famous Pike’s Place Market revealed Toronto forward Jared McCann. Bruins’ defender Jeremy Lauzon actually got da’ call first-overall selection! Said over-sized calamari has since become an offering on a Chinese buffet! More on the icer-club-in-question next week!
If a Christopher Lambert mainstay Mortal Kombat thunder-god character meets the Sin City pro football team, do they become the “Las Vegas Raidens”???!!
Dippin' into da’ vintage vault...if “A Few Good Men” meets an Olympic figure-skating champ, do we hear Jack Nicholson assert...””You can’t Hamill da’ truth!”
Black Shirt: This week’s awesome article–of-clothing goes to the Alma Mater’s P/K Jordan Stout fer missin’ a 49-yard FG that kept the final total below 60 (to his credit, the youngster also kicked the ball away four times, averaging 49.3 yards per boot!)
Shoppe Talk: We roll-out the Ye Olde Taxidermy Shoppe red-carpet fer da’ Fresno State Bull-puppies for posting a losing hat-trick in three tries on the year!
“Locked in Box”: Joja’s domination of the Gators elevates the “lock”-record to 7-2 (.778)
“Wish We Had It Back”: We called two games last week in this category, but we’ll go with Texas @ BAYLOR “over 61” when we noted Bears “averaging 32 ppg scored while permitting just 24 ppg-against over last 4 contests”.
Vindy’s Week 10 Best Bets: Last Week: 1-3 Season: 18-18-1 (.500)
RUTGERS +12 ½ over Wisconsin, Colorado State @ WYOMING “under 40”, Oregon State –11 over COLORADO, San Jose State @ UNR “over 55”
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